Waking Up in a Haze

Imagine this: you wake up from surgery, screaming your lungs out, and you can’t even open your eyes to see what’s going on! Yeah, that was me, hands glued to my face like I was trying to win a prize for best mime act. The nurses rush in, probably thinking I’m auditioning for a horror film, but little do they know that my brain just jolted back a decade to a way worse time—the day of my infamous severance procedure.

What’s the Deal with Severance?

Now, “severance” has taken on a whole new meaning since that mind-bending Apple TV show hit the screens in 2022. In the show, those poor white-collar souls at Lumon Industries have their brains split into two personalities: the workaholic “Innie” and the laid-back “Outie.” It’s like a split personality party where no one remembers who the heck they are when they switch! And while the characters like Mark and Helly are pure fiction, the underlying concept is all too real.

Living My Own Version of Severance

For the past ten years, I’ve been navigating my own version of severance, thanks to complex post-traumatic stress disorder (C-PTSD). Picture me in a world filled with confusion after experiencing septic shock from a series of unfortunate surgeries. But hey, who needs a clear narrative when you can have an epic battle with your own mind every single day?

Onscreen Representation

Finally, I spotted a piece of myself on screen in Severance. It captures that heart-stopping moment when your mind takes a scenic trip away from reality, leaving you stranded in an alternate universe where nothing feels familiar. The show brilliantly portrays how just one little trigger—a sound, a texture—can shove you into a different compartment of your brain, completely derailing your day.

Feeling Like a Character

Some days I feel like Irving, with dark thoughts oozing between my two worlds, where one is full of hope and the other? A big ol’ fog of confusion! Other days, I channel Dylan, making desperate attempts to explain my fractured self to the world while juggling my search for work. Not to mention the sympathy pineapple fruit basket that feels more like a consolation prize than a gesture of support.

Stuck in the Elevator

Most times, I’m in Mark’s shoes, metaphorically trapped in an elevator trying to blend in. It’s exhausting! My ‘Outie’ has no clue what the ‘Innie’ goes through during the day, which can be a bit of a buzzkill during family gatherings. No one can truly understand what it’s like to live in my chaotic world.

Therapy and the Reintegration Struggle

My therapy sessions could pass for a scene in Severance, where I’m just chatting with myself, trying to reason with the other side. I pull in all my energy to make sense of both parts, desperately seeking to find peace. It’s like drinking a sludge intended to bring clarity but usually just leaves me feeling nauseous—and not the fun kind!

Promises of a New Life

Both Lumon employees and I share a harsh reality: we thought we’d signed up for a fresh start, only to discover the new beginnings come with a hefty toll. The allure of a ‘better’ life turned out to be an illusion, leaving me gasping for air under the weight of what I used to be.

The Press Event that Changed My Perspective

In April 2025, I found myself at a Severance press event right at the Lumon headquarters. Standing there in my post-surgery boot, I heard Ben Stiller ponder aloud about why viewers connect so deeply with the show. And for someone like me, Severance isn’t just entertainment; it’s a mirror reflecting my struggle, and a reason why I’ve always wanted to be knee-deep in the film industry.

Reintegration: The Real Challenge

In the end, Severance encapsulates my biggest challenge: how to reintegrate and reclaim a semblance of wholeness after drastic changes. For me, this show isn’t a mystery; it’s an explanation, a validation of what I’ve been living through.