It All Ends with a Wedding!

Imagine this: at the end of The Conjuring: Last Rites, paranormal power couple Ed and Lorraine Warren—beautifully played by Patrick Wilson and Vera Farmiga—are shimmying at their daughter Judy’s wedding. Yes, you heard that right! Amidst joyous celebrations, there’s Judy, fresh off the market, tying the knot with her dreamy husband, Tony. The dance floor is buzzing with familiar faces—like Carolyn Perron, Janet Hodgson, and David Glatzel—all past clients who’ve danced with the paranormal, and believe it or not, even James Wan, the mastermind behind the first two films, is somewhere in the happy crowd.

What’s with the Wedding Guests?

Now, throwing these paranormal pals together at a wedding in a Catholic cathedral? Genius! The Conjuring franchise has always been a love letter to family values and a serious nod to Catholic beliefs. Our dynamic duo, Ed and Lorraine, often wield their rosaries and prayers like superhero gadgets, defending families from creeping demons who just can’t resist crashing dinner parties.

Conservative Vibes Anyone?

Some might be scratching their heads at calling this series a conservative romp—believe it or not, it’s true! The films often serve up spooky shenanigans whenever families are facing the heat. Be it a dad stuck on the road or stress in a single-parent household, demons are just lurking around, ready to pounce whenever family ties start to fray.

Okay, so in past films, we could lean back and enjoy the chills without too much political baggage, but then along comes The Conjuring: Last Rites, waving its conservative flag like it’s a high school pep rally, leaving character development in the dust and scares taking a backseat.

A Peek into the Specter of Conservativism

Just take a quick glance at how audiences reacted to the first two Conjuring films! Despite the increasingly conservative undertones, fans gobbled them up, just as they overlooked the less-than-heroic matters surrounding the actual Ed and Lorraine Warren—who have had some shady accusations thrown their way.

Hey, it’s cinema! Even classics like The General walk a fine line, combining thrilling stunts and not-so-great moral plots. Sure, Dirty Harry is as much about state power as it is a nail-biting thrill ride.

Where Did the Fun Go?

The first two flicks delivered heart-pounding scares and boasted the electrifying chemistry of Wilson and Farmiga. But since director Michael Chaves took the reins, the joy has fizzled out, and the preachy vibes are blaring louder than the jump scares! Most of Chaves’s chilling moments simply involve cranking up the sound at unexpected times, yawn!

The characters aren’t just facing ghosts; they’re wrestling with conservative ideologies at every turn. Ed’s facing the reality of his old age while Lorraine and Judy tackle their deepest fears like a family therapy session gone rogue.

Getting Personal with the Paranormal

Take this film’s runtime of 135 minutes: much of it is bogged down with feelings instead of fright! The retirement party shows more handheld close-ups and radiant sunlight than it does spooks. It’s like watching a Hallmark movie with a ghostly twist!

While there’s nothing wrong with developing characters, Last Rites only cares if they fit into its narrow world of conservative goodness. Follow the family tree, folks! At the climactic moment, Judy gets possessed and drama unfolds as Ed tries to save her while Lorraine’s praying up a storm. Cue in his heart giving out, and guess who steps up? Tony, the husband. It’s like a passing of the paranormal baton! And when Judy’s saved through Tony’s meddling, oh boy, Lorraine’s prayers get answered. It’s a supernatural happy ending wrapped in a conservative bow.

The Final Ideological Showdown

Honestly, the emphasis on Ed and Lorraine’s picture-perfect Catholic marriage isn’t exactly a revelation for this series—it’s been lurking in the shadows since the start. But while the initial flicks managed to blend captivating storytelling with engaging characters, Last Rites leans way too hard on its ideological stance.

By the time guest stars from previous installments show up at Judy and Tony’s wedding, they feel less like beloved characters and more like avatars for a worldview. They’re not just guests; they’re a showcase for the movie’s message: conservative Catholicism reigns supreme and the nuclear family is the gold standard.

So, sit back, pour yourself some popcorn, and enjoy the