Ashton Kutcher Was Hospitalized Preparing for Steve Jobs Biopic "jOBS"

Jobs died of it. No treatments for cancer, just f*cking fruits... Good job, Jobs.

"I was doubled over in pain. My pancreas levels were completely out of whack."

TRANSLATION: I was sh*ttin' like a motherf*cker.

Lesson learned: EAT MEAT YOU PUSSIES.

I would rip out my own pancreas, shove an ipad up my ass and drag by balls over 40 miles of broken glass just to suck a fart out of mila kunis's butthole so ashton could die a happy man

lol

I had no idea Ashton Kutcher is a cannibal.

Ashton is still a c*nt

'Kutcher's hospital visit ended up bringing the actor closer to Jobs.' --- so, Kutcher is dead then, or just his acting career?

Kutcher was hospitalized after using his brain for the first time in his life.

Kutcher kept a jar of human cancerous *ssholes in formaldehyde in his trailer, just to inspire his portrayal of Jobs.

"Ashton Kutcher studied hundreds of hours of Steve Jobs footage in order to duplicate the walk and the demeanor of the co-founder of Apple."


And I hear the Bangles wrote a theme song for the movie titled 'Walk like an *sshole'.

Asston is such a dimwit. Steve Jobs was a computer geek, not a nutritionist...and he's dead; neither is a recommendation for following his diet.

Kutcher is full of sh*t, and so are people who believe that a fruitarian diet is what leads you to the hospital. Like vegetarianism and veganism, it's all about balance, diversity and quality of food. It's very hard to keep up on a fruitarian diet because people usually don't eat enough, it's not easy to get enough calories from fruits, you have to eat a lot. Kutcher just doesn't know what he's talking about and probably ate ridiculous amounts and didn't balance his diet properly. There are thousands of people living on a fruitarian diet nowadays, and they've been doing so for years. Usually the healthies people you can find. Steve Jobs didn't die from that either, there were other reasons involved.
One more celebrity who talks about a topic they know nothing about and who'll be believed by plenty of people who know nothing about it either.

Arti talks too much.

Despite the fact two fairly clever jokes of mine went unrecognized for their brilliance, I want to clear something up.

Jobs didn't die because of CANCER. He died because he was an arrogant, narcissistic psychopath who REFUSED proper treatment, because he believed medical technology was inferior to some Eastern holistic bullsh*t.

In other words, the man who was touted as Mr. Technology, a title far more apposite for Wozniak, refused the best modern medicine a man, any man alive, could ever possibly afford.

In even more words, his ego and his downright stupidity killed him, although like Dinah Lohan, prostate cancer is a tough c*nt to beat.

Haha. That I do, DeaftOne. But only when what I read is ridiculous. And I didn't even say anything when I read other posts saying Chris Nolan was a genius or that Inglorious Basterds was an awesome film. So I do my best to shut up :D

I said Jobs didn't die from cancer. He did, of course, but he could have potentially lived longer if he had actually not been a douchefag and sought the best care he could have afforded, which would have included a hand job from Jesus Christ, I imagine.

JACK ME OFF JESUS f*ckING CHRIST YOU f*ckING HEAVENLY HALOED JEWISH WHORE OF WHORES!!



Okay. I'm better now.

I love all u guys and the day i cant talk to you makes me rly sad.

Ranger- He actually had a career at one point?

^^Do you consider keeping Demi's shriveled egg hangars warm a career?

^ Ewww

^ Ewww

LOL.........Ashton Kutchner played himself.......was anyone expecting anything different?

^I would if the vacancy is open.

and bt that i mean.......he never sr
trived nor did anyth8ng di8fferent frm his character.........new keyboard sorry.......all i seen was Ashton kutcher in the trailer

Dr. Mustafa: "Mr. Kutcher, last time I saw an *sshole messed up so bad was when I went to see a movie with Mickey Roorke"

"Mr. Kutcher, showing coconuts up your ass does not equate to fruitarian diet"

@BC - I'm continually fascinated by those that continue to hire c*nt drip Kutcher for anything. He did his bit for The 70's Show, and understand he was good (ok?) in The Butterfly Effect. That's it. Throwing it into old Demi is his claim to fame. Thank God he's stepped up (and into) Mila Kuntis (yeah... I spelled that correctly). Otherwise, every job he and Lohan get is another reveal as to Hollyweirds desperation for any kind of talent.

When asked, Jack Lallane said, "Im dead, you idiot!"

But Im sure if he was alive he would say, "wutta mary"

Kutcher's hospital visit ended up bringing the actor closer to best actor...

at the RAZZIE awards

Killers was one of the absolute worst movies I've ever seen.

There. I've said it.

I appaud you, Mink, for having the courage to admit that you actually saw 'Killers'. Admitting you have a problem is the first step...