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First "Battleship" Reviews are Negative

Posted: April 11th, 2012 by WorstPreviews.com Staff
First "Battleship" Reviews are NegativeSubmit Comment
Peter Berg's "Battleship" is set to hit US theaters on May 18th, but has already been released in plenty of other countries. The first reviews are now appearing online and they are mostly negative. Almost everyone agrees that this is a dumb movie with little plot, but some claim that it's also very entertaining.

We compiled some reviews for you look at. Check them out below and hopefully they'll help you make up your mind about whether you want to see "Battleship."

The Playlist: [D-] Jokes about the blockbuster movie based on a board game over the last two or three years were entirely justified.

Empire Online: [4/10] An event movie so lunkheaded - both in concept and execution - that it's hard not to suspect director Peter Berg of playing a prank.

QuickFlix: [4/10] A suitably brain-dead and super silly action flick based on a classic – but notably plot-free – board game.

HeyUGuys: [3/10] Wavers between disoriented action movie and outright acceptance of Michael Bay as Lord and Savior.

DigitalSpy: [6/10] One big cheese-fest and somewhat akin to shoving 10 different movies into a blender and throwing the results up on screen.

MovieWeb: [6/10] Guilty fun and the effects are awesome.

Matt's Movie Reviews: [6/10] What 'Battleship' lacks in smarts and innovation it makes up for in pure popcorn entertainment.

SFX: [5/10] If you love military hardware, it's a great naval gazing exercise. But as a blockbuster it's all a bit half-mast.

What Culture: [4/10] With the punishingly dull, endlessly monotonous 'Battleship,' Peter Berg has given the term 'a poor man's Michael Bay' credibility.

Your Movies: [5/10] Isn't the kind of film where an exploration of character complexities is expected.

The List: [4/10] Delivers the spectacle you'd expect from a summer blockbuster but it's ultimately sunk by uneven tone and a paper thin plot.

TotalFilm: [4/10] Misguided in the extreme.

Source: Various


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Displaying 41 comment(s) Profanity: Turn On
minkowski writes:
on April 11th, 2012 at 8:44:57 PM

Regardless, it'll make a bajillion dollars. That's how these things work.
happileperkon writes:
on April 11th, 2012 at 8:49:26 PM

i hope to god that at some point they say "you sunk my battleship!" like jim carrey as the riddler did in batman forever.
secondbest writes:
on April 11th, 2012 at 8:56:06 PM

It's got explosions in it. Explosions = #1 spot in the box office these days so the filmmakers shouldn't be too worried.
johnny_boy writes:
on April 11th, 2012 at 8:58:11 PM

Gee, a film based on a board game along with a hot but untalented singer didn't get good reviews?! Whew thank God I was sitting down. And as Mink stated, it's gonna make tons of money, that what sucks the most.
Movieguru2 writes:
on April 11th, 2012 at 9:12:07 PM

why am i so not surprised? it looks preetttttty awful. but that won't stop the money from coming in
Cannon writes:
on April 11th, 2012 at 10:00:56 PM

In other news: The sky is f*cking blue.
mpiper821 writes:
on April 11th, 2012 at 10:06:47 PM

Wow thats Shocking!!!
steamluv writes:
on April 11th, 2012 at 11:03:57 PM

First reviews negative? No sh*t?!
pornfly writes:
on April 11th, 2012 at 11:10:55 PM

Just saw Drive and whoever said it was boring and slow has no appreciation for drama or suspence

It had a Michael Mann 80s feel to it
But needed some Christina Hendricks boobs(her and her dweeb asshusband)
pornfly writes:
on April 11th, 2012 at 11:17:47 PM

I wonder if these reviews would be different if Bay were directing
TRUEMAN writes:
on April 11th, 2012 at 11:20:37 PM

Really, you are just f*cking kidding me!
BadChadB33 writes:
on April 11th, 2012 at 11:24:15 PM

And I thought this was oscar material, imagine that!
BadChadB33 writes:
on April 11th, 2012 at 11:25:38 PM

And I thought this was oscar material, imagine that!
telur writes:
on April 11th, 2012 at 11:38:52 PM

"Almost everyone agrees that this is a dumb movie with little plot, but some claim that it's also very entertaining."

---> for me it's very entertaining.

I don't want watch every movie like Inception or The Artist or King of Speech. Sometime I want see a movie with no brain just explosion!!!
telur writes:
on April 11th, 2012 at 11:39:50 PM

so for me "Battleship" Reviews is Positive --> I don't care what other people said
pornfly writes:
on April 11th, 2012 at 11:43:35 PM

You can have no brains all explosions,just dont name it after a game that you need brains to cause explosions
pornfly writes:
on April 11th, 2012 at 11:45:36 PM

King of Speech
Is that with MINK??

was The Artist was an action movie?
CelluloidMan writes:
on April 12th, 2012 at 12:36:53 AM

..."poor man's Michael Bay.." DAMN, THAT FELT LIKE A KICK IN THE NUTS!!...and that comment wasn't even directed at me!!
Rambo writes:
on April 12th, 2012 at 12:52:25 AM

yes,well,the trailer clearly shows there's nothing in this movie but explosions and bad acting
Motorious writes:
on April 12th, 2012 at 12:52:41 AM

You sunk my Battleship? . . .
DeVries writes:
on April 12th, 2012 at 1:57:06 AM

Color me suprised. What can we expect from a movie with that bitch Rihanna in it anyway.
pornfly writes:
on April 12th, 2012 at 2:02:52 AM

I still say a video with Rhianna being beaten with a ship in a bottle by Chris Brown would be better
trailertrash writes:
on April 12th, 2012 at 2:47:32 AM

MovieWeb: [6/10] Guilty fun and the effects are awesome.

That will do .....

We are watching it Saturday, It was that or Mirror Mirror, I believe this will be the better choice !!
trailertrash writes:
on April 12th, 2012 at 2:54:39 AM

pornfly

Agree mate, Drive was a very cool movie.

That film really splits peoples opinion it's either a love or hate it movie.

Maybe people that didn't like Drive should go and rent Ryan O'Neal's Driver (another good movie) instead
telur writes:
on April 12th, 2012 at 4:13:24 AM

btw, Alexander Saagard is dead in first 30 minutes... and the aliens look like human

and they still play Battleship board in this movie
telur writes:
on April 12th, 2012 at 4:14:22 AM

oh yeah this is like Michael Bay's movies
Freudian_Nightmare writes:
on April 12th, 2012 at 4:59:16 AM

I think these reviews are very unjust. I bet none of the reviewers have actually played the game.
Džeko writes:
on April 12th, 2012 at 5:29:05 AM

"One big cheese-fest" sounds about right.
Bullit writes:
on April 12th, 2012 at 5:41:34 AM

"Regardless, it'll make a bajillion dollars. That's how these things work."

I guarantee you that it will Not include my 10 €!

The trailer showed enough similarities with the dreadful Skyline & Battle L.A. wich was more than enough for me.
Bullit writes:
on April 12th, 2012 at 5:46:05 AM

"I still say a video with Rhianna being beaten with a ship in a bottle by Chris Brown would be better"

Lol! Nice one PORNFLY.
bandolero999 writes:
on April 12th, 2012 at 7:16:04 AM

I wasn't gonna spend my money on this sh*t anyway,so I got nothing to lose.
Kurskij writes:
on April 12th, 2012 at 7:32:49 AM

Michael Bay of today is a poor-mans Michael Bay.

But that still gotta hurt for Berg.
Serpico1988 writes:
on April 12th, 2012 at 10:02:21 AM

I Bet liam neeson will die in the climatic action sequence.. an Armageddon-Bruce willis type death.

Serpico1988 writes:
on April 12th, 2012 at 10:09:18 AM

Drive -one of my favorite films of 2011.. along with Warrior, The Ides of March, The Descendants, Moneyball, The Tree of Life.
Serpico1988 writes:
on April 12th, 2012 at 10:11:47 AM

And f*ck going to the cinema for this, I got my assignments to complete and i dont have time to waste on this crap.

Role on June 1st - for that is the day I go watch PROMETHEUS !!
Dre-EL writes:
on April 12th, 2012 at 10:12:02 AM

To be expected.
Dr. Damariusvashanti writes:
on April 12th, 2012 at 10:47:12 AM

And q trailer and ranger cause I will not be tact or forgiving and that's saying much
Kurskij writes:
on April 12th, 2012 at 11:20:16 AM

Yeah, it will definitely hurt its Oscar chances.
vincere01 writes:
on April 12th, 2012 at 2:05:07 PM

You know...suprisingly no one in the media has pointed this out yet....but the US NAVY retired all battleships in the fleet about a decade ago. They became obsolete because of super carriers. They basically just have no need for them anymore. Just too expensive
vincere01 writes:
on April 12th, 2012 at 2:14:07 PM

Its not like this was supposed to be a realistic military movie. But still, just weird
minkowski writes:
on April 12th, 2012 at 3:21:25 PM

Actually, interesting enough, the last battleships were decommissioned in 1991, two decades ago, and one of them was the USS Missouri, which was featured in Under Siege.

The decision to decommission was based on the susceptibility of battleships to torpedoes and land mines, the fact few battleships ever engaged directly into combat, the increase in scope of naval combat, overall cost, and the comparative effectiveness of aircraft carriers.

The last battleship built was during WWII, btw, and during the Cold War, they served as backup fire for carriers, but I doubt most people neither know nor care for any of the above facts.

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