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"Superman" News: Lindsay Lohan is Lana Lang, New Plot Summary

Posted: April 17th, 2011 by WorstPreviews.com Staff
"Superman" News: Lindsay Lohan is Lana Lang, New Plot SummarySubmit Comment
Several credible sources have been reporting that Lindsay Lohan has had conversations with Warner Bros to star in the "Superman" reboot. And just recently, there has been a rumor that she's in talks to play a villain alongside Lex Luthor.

Now, CBN has learned that she is not being considered for a villain role, but for Lana Lang. "She will be a popular girl in high school who doesn't give Clark the time of day," said the site. "While Clark can't really show Lana who he really is (a super man), she eventually discovers for herself when sees Clark do a rescue."

Baseline Studio System, an entertainment database that has revealed lots of secretive plot summaries before, has now posted the following for the "Superman" movie. "A young reporter named Clark Kent roams the world covering various news stories. When he is compelled to use his secret powers to intervene in a crisis in West Africa, he returns to Smallville to learn more about his origins and the hero he was born to be."

Click here to read more about "Superman."

Source: CBN, BleedingCool, Baseline Studio System


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Displaying 63 comment(s) Profanity: Turn On
pikeman1 writes:
on April 17th, 2011 at 6:53:48 AM

I think there'll be many comments about this!
Sonic writes:
on April 17th, 2011 at 6:56:38 AM

superman curse strikes again.
DaveThePhotoGuy writes:
on April 17th, 2011 at 7:00:53 AM

Not keen on that story at all.

Not bothered either way about Lohag being in it.
Lt. Mike Harrigan writes:
on April 17th, 2011 at 7:15:57 AM

*Yawn*
Lt. Mike Harrigan writes:
on April 17th, 2011 at 7:16:04 AM

*Yawn*
rocketman writes:
on April 17th, 2011 at 7:26:19 AM

I bet you only see Supes in full suit and cape for the big climax.For like 15 minutes.Tops.
telur writes:
on April 17th, 2011 at 7:26:54 AM

i bet it will longest comment in here
ramboroberto writes:
on April 17th, 2011 at 8:31:57 AM

This storyline seems very similar to a graphic novel entitled Birthright. Wasn't bad and Lex was the villian. Could work withn Nolan's treatment quite successfully.
boogiel writes:
on April 17th, 2011 at 8:36:25 AM

This is a nightmare. I surely hope that this is a total and complete Bullsh*t. Lohan is nothing but drugged-up filth. There's no need to tarnish this movie by casting her. Thank you Snyder, you've made my interest in this movie just went down gazillion notches.
Crazyhorse writes:
on April 17th, 2011 at 8:54:55 AM

This news is as stupid as those pictures below
ChainsawX writes:
on April 17th, 2011 at 8:58:06 AM

so will zod make her kneel before him...it wont be that hard for him to do so
Crazyhorse writes:
on April 17th, 2011 at 8:59:01 AM

So much hope for this movie, now destroyed in seconds by an arrogant alcholic and thief
Devil writes:
on April 17th, 2011 at 9:09:19 AM

Just tell me this is not TRUE!!!
BadChadB33 writes:
on April 17th, 2011 at 9:17:37 AM

I hate this movie already!!
BlackieChan writes:
on April 17th, 2011 at 9:19:38 AM

So this is pretty much a movie version of Smallville?
SaulSilver writes:
on April 17th, 2011 at 10:16:17 AM

Source: CBN, BleedingCool, Baseline Studio System

These are what you call "Several credible sources"???
HAHAHAHAH
OneTime writes:
on April 17th, 2011 at 12:35:30 PM

lindsays vag = kryptonite....the end
billofill writes:
on April 17th, 2011 at 1:36:12 PM

SO this is Birthright but with actual Krytponian Invaders hmmmmmmmm.
encoreyourface writes:
on April 17th, 2011 at 1:59:15 PM

wow if the news we've been getting about this film are true, it's already sh*t.
trailertrash writes:
on April 17th, 2011 at 2:16:28 PM

"She will be a popular girl in high school

(who will f*ck anything that moves including her own parents, Major drug user, Totally wastes any good opportunity life gives her, A Theif, Has no self respect what so ever and is a total bitch)

who doesn't give Clark the time of day"

She sounds like perfect casting to me.


minkowski writes:
on April 17th, 2011 at 2:43:18 PM

I just want this joke of a Superman film to fail already and put to rest the idea of ever bringing the big blue to the big screen.

I hope they do it. I hope they cast the bitch and I hope she ruins the film, because they aren't, from what I can tell, doing this character any justice. No pun...ah, f*ck it.
trailertrash writes:
on April 17th, 2011 at 4:19:07 PM

This is becoming like the real life version of The Producers, Instead of Springtime for Hitler it's this Superman Movie.

Warners best Check Nolan and Snyder's financial status.
Crazyhorse writes:
on April 17th, 2011 at 4:35:38 PM

While they're at it, hire some more hollywood nut jobs to ruin this film

Nic Cage
Charlie Sheen
Joaquin Phoenix
Woody Allen
Rosie Odonell

Am I missing anyone?
LEONCIO writes:
on April 17th, 2011 at 4:43:17 PM

THIS HAS TO BE A f*ckING BAD JOKE, RIGHT????
trailertrash writes:
on April 17th, 2011 at 4:43:55 PM

Well Nic Cage has worn the Superman suit before.
minkowski writes:
on April 17th, 2011 at 4:59:02 PM

Crazyhorse: that's your list? Jesus, throw in Lady Gaga with her meatware and egghouse and her drooping twat mouth, or Michael Douglas or Tim "whackjob" Robbins or Susan Sarandon or a thousand other nuts.

"Am I missing anyone?"

Pretty much all of them, I think.
Crazyhorse writes:
on April 17th, 2011 at 5:15:36 PM

I forgot, god herself Shirley Mcclain
Crazyhorse writes:
on April 17th, 2011 at 5:28:10 PM

Let me guess

Instead of having John Williams who in my opinion created one of the greatest movie soundtracks of all time with Donner's Superman

Lady Caca, Little Wayne, and 50 cent will be hired to create a complilation that will do Lohans Superman proud
minkowski writes:
on April 17th, 2011 at 5:31:07 PM

James Cameron, he's a nut. And some of these psychos:

http://www.humanevents.com/article.php?id=37688

Al Gore should play Lex Luthor. Perfect.
minkowski writes:
on April 17th, 2011 at 5:35:07 PM

Crazy: I'd love to wash Lady gaga with used Brillo Pads, bathe her in sulfuric acid and slide her ever so slowly into a rusty wood chipper.

Little Wayne amd Fiddy? They'll get their's soon enough.
Crazyhorse writes:
on April 17th, 2011 at 5:40:58 PM

Mink

Great article

Yes when you become a hollywood star you enter the Jor-el comes and gives you "The Green Crystal" from Krypton which gives you knowledge above and beyond us "Simpltons" like you and me
Crazyhorse writes:
on April 17th, 2011 at 5:43:16 PM

delete

you enter the from the previous post
Crazyhorse writes:
on April 17th, 2011 at 6:00:54 PM

Mink

Little over the top there
I take it we shouldnt piss you off
triggax writes:
on April 17th, 2011 at 6:08:44 PM

The presence of the all powerful Nic Cage could only help this apparent train wreck.

If they were f*cking smart they would have just hired Nic Cage to play Superman and John Travolta to play Lex Luthor.. and at some point they have to take off their faces..

And theres lots of guns and explosions and screaming and great 90's music.

Thats how this should be done, but it wont be.. Woohoo for lindsay lohan.. Superman : Man of Steel.. Aka dumping ground for has beens...

Sounds like fun.
minkowski writes:
on April 17th, 2011 at 6:27:42 PM

"Little over the top there
I take it we shouldnt piss you off"

Nah. I'm a real p*ssycat. Just ask Trig's wife.
sm00th_eskimo writes:
on April 17th, 2011 at 6:37:59 PM

maybe this article is about the new porno version of superman with lohan being the skankiest lana ever imagined. the movie will be titled "Super men in lana lang"!!!!!
MrHeck writes:
on April 17th, 2011 at 7:18:14 PM

New plot summary:
Clark Kent (Superman) gets the aids of Lana Lang and travels to West Africa on a quest to find the cure.

PLUS: a cameo of Brandon "plastic-b*tichface" Routh and Brian "i-can't-direct-for-sh*t" Singer as dying HIV victims.

triggax writes:
on April 17th, 2011 at 7:52:07 PM

Hahaha!!! I think you misheard her, Mink.. She said "HUNG like a p*ssy cat"..
minkowski writes:
on April 17th, 2011 at 8:08:01 PM

You seem to have heard that line before, Trig. Lots of familiarity there.
Scott Baiowulf writes:
on April 17th, 2011 at 8:08:33 PM

Had hope...

Now nope
YoungChris writes:
on April 17th, 2011 at 8:18:39 PM

she's not beautiful enough to play the charecter but she's cute ...
minkowski writes:
on April 17th, 2011 at 8:35:41 PM

Isn't it amazing that you can do all the bad things this chick has done and still get offers for roles in major films, and not just any major film, a Snyder-Nolan Superman film.
yatedogg writes:
on April 17th, 2011 at 9:34:25 PM

she should have to arm wrestle Kristen Kruek for that role...and while they are at it get rid of that Brit and give the role to Tom Welling
Ranger writes:
on April 17th, 2011 at 9:45:28 PM

I'd like to see the trowel she uses to put on her eye liner.

F*cking trailer park whore. You're think she's trying out to play a racoon next to Jean-Claude VanDruggie in Kunt-F*ck Panda 16.

Ranger writes:
on April 17th, 2011 at 9:59:24 PM

"...she eventually discovers for herself when sees Clark do a rescue." --- after which Kal-El decides he must snuff Lana's life force by dropping a train onto her.
Max Rockatansky Junior writes:
on April 17th, 2011 at 10:39:08 PM

"Superman" News: Lindsay Lohan is Lana Lang, New Plot Summary ... well, at least we know for certainty one f*cking thing about this nuclear meltdown of a movie : Kryptonite hidden in a lead safe with a sign pointing " Superman! Remove this or all of Earth will die! " will be the LEAST of Kal-El's problems.

That f*cking vagina could smother out and incinerate Darkseid.
Max Rockatansky Junior writes:
on April 17th, 2011 at 10:40:39 PM

"Just when you thought Zack Snyder couldn't f*ck up any worse then Sucker Punch .... guess what ? Two words : Lindsay Lohan. "
Max Rockatansky Junior writes:
on April 17th, 2011 at 10:41:40 PM

This f*cking Superman is going to be more crippled than the current skeleton of Christopher Reeves with the snapped spinal cord.
Max Rockatansky Junior writes:
on April 17th, 2011 at 10:43:23 PM

minkowski writes:
on April 17th, 2011 at 8:35:41 PM
Isn't it amazing that you can do all the bad things this chick has done and still get offers for roles in major films, and not just any major film, a Snyder-Nolan Superman film.

@minkowski

Selling your soul and Hollywood goes hand in hand, so this really doesn't surprise me.
Max Rockatansky Junior writes:
on April 17th, 2011 at 10:44:53 PM

Kal-El doesn't have enough heat ray shooting out of his eyes to burn off all the vaginal warts Lana's wearing, like a wasp nest growing out of her labia.
Max Rockatansky Junior writes:
on April 17th, 2011 at 10:46:39 PM

triggax writes:
on April 17th, 2011 at 7:52:07 PM
Hahaha!!! I think you misheard her, Mink.. She said "HUNG like a p*ssy cat"..

@triggax

More hung like violin strings being cured after the intestines have been ripped out violently from a dead cat.
Max Rockatansky Junior writes:
on April 17th, 2011 at 10:48:35 PM

We should all just convince Lindsay to take up equestrian show jumping .... so she can snap her neck and look like a skanky, female version Stephen Hawking

Ranger writes:
on April 18th, 2011 at 12:57:41 AM

'...is going to be more crippled than the current skeleton of Christopher Reeves with the snapped spinal cord.' --- lol.

Annnnndddd... LIGHTNING STRIKES!!!

manichispanic writes:
on April 18th, 2011 at 1:26:50 AM

nah
SpookyCupcakes writes:
on April 18th, 2011 at 3:43:52 PM

Another f*cking origins movie.

WHY.
rabid writes:
on April 18th, 2011 at 4:38:19 PM

They legally don't have a choice. The greedy grandkids of Superman's creators insured that WB has to do a completely original take on the character if they want to keep him.

Also, it's going to take a reboot to get the taste of that last Superman film out of billions of disgusted mouths.
The_Zizzler writes:
on April 18th, 2011 at 5:56:17 PM

Superman: Birthright is one of the best origin comics ever created. The introduction to CK and SM is Much better than the original Donner movie.

I guarantee you this movie will NOT flop. I am willing to bet my testicles this will be on par with SM 1 if not better.
FilmFan91201 writes:
on April 18th, 2011 at 7:05:41 PM

Please. No. Why not just get Charlie Sheen while you're at it to play Lex Luthor?
FilmFan91201 writes:
on April 18th, 2011 at 7:05:48 PM

Please. No. Why not just get Charlie Sheen while you're at it to play Lex Luthor?
LastActionHero writes:
on April 19th, 2011 at 6:51:36 AM

Better casting than that turd they picked for Zod.
Trip Maverick writes:
on April 19th, 2011 at 9:29:50 AM

@Lastactionhero Have you not seen boardwalk empire? Shannon is awesome in that. Hes got my vote.

As for Lohan, Theres no news on Superhero hype or other film ssites so I wont beleive this till I get a confirmation from WB and snyder.
LastActionHero writes:
on April 19th, 2011 at 10:59:03 AM

@Trip

Yes. I've seen him in several things. It's always the same.. he muggs that creepy face of his in the camera and mumbles out his lines. He will be a terrible Zod.

It's as reliable and cheesy as Nic Cage making his crazy eyes an yelling.
seveltoto writes:
on November 7th, 2017 at 12:29:39 AM


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