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Bam Margera is a Mess After "Jackass 3D" Shoot

Posted: February 5th, 2010 by WorstPreviews.com Staff
Bam Margera is a Mess After "Jackass 3D" ShootSubmit Comment
The third "Jackass" movie is set to hit theaters on October 15th in 3D. It has already wrapped up filming and TMZ caught with Bam Margera to find out how it went.

A few days ago, Bam was spotted outside the Katsuya restaurant in Los Angeles. He was either full of medication or incredibly fatigued. It turns out that it was both. And the reason was that he just returned from the "Jackass 3D" shoot.

"I just flew in from London," he said. "I got hit by a bus. Then I got hit by a taxi cab. Then I jumped in the god damn f*cking Thames River. That happened yesterday. Now I'm here."

It's good to see that Bam is alive, because after the second installment he was worried that the only way to outdo the last two films was to do stunts that could potentially kill him.

Source: TMZ


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Displaying 191 comment(s) Profanity: Turn On
Freudian_Nightmare writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 5:36:58 AM

Die already.
Goober3000 writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 5:37:23 AM

haha yea....laughing already
Bob82 writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 6:12:30 AM

First one was cool, second one, not so much. I still have hopes for this one.
Goober3000 writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 6:25:09 AM

as long as they dont drink any more horse c*m or piss im cool with it
Ari Gold writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 7:05:16 AM

Didn't they only start filming beginning of January? One months work, too easy.
VDODSON writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 7:09:15 AM

How is that stuff even funny. Black people may have alot of problems, but you cant say were crazy. Come on, drinking horse piss, and sticking stuff up your ass (no offense Vindandy) ?
Goober3000 writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 7:26:30 AM

I think the stupid sh*t they do is funny as for the gross sh*t...no thanx fast forward button...and when I say fast worward button I realy mean slow mo button j/k or am I?
grizzle writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 7:47:20 AM

awww come on the part in the first one where they electro-shocked the gooch was priceless!
Goober3000 writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 8:13:31 AM

LMAO yea that was funny
RickyGabrielBird writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 8:23:55 AM

This film will be f*cked up. I think people will puke if they see this stuff in 3D.
Goober3000 writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 8:30:22 AM

AH STEV-O'S BULGE IS COMING RIGHT AT ME!!!
lawman writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 9:05:26 AM

VDOD>>>> Us whites do the crazy sh*t that could hurt us. Blacks do the crazy sh*t that could get them landed in jail. Its a give and take relationship.
SACdaddy writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 9:28:33 AM

I love seeing white people doin stupid sh*t for money! The Japanese need some competition. I get about as much entertainment out of it as I do seeing yall get chopped up in horror films. Keep it coming!
Goober3000 writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 11:17:52 AM

what do you call a car full of black guys? Tinted windows AHAHAHAHAHA!
warriors187 writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 11:19:28 AM

@Sacdaddy
I enjoy watching old clips of Katrina, you d*ck
warriors187 writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 11:20:40 AM

How do you kill a thousand flys at one?
You smack an Ethiopian in the face with a frying pan
Goober3000 writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 11:25:17 AM

what do you call black kids playing in a pile of leaves? Raisin Bran AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!
SACdaddy writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 11:33:57 AM

what do you call a bunch of white guys sitting on a bench?

the NBA
Goober3000 writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 11:44:53 AM

I dont watch basketball soo...I dont get it. Why dont black people get ate by sharks, they thought it was whale sh*t AHAHAHAHAHAHA
SACdaddy writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 11:47:42 AM

Ok how about....

What do you call 300 white guys chasing one black guy?

the PGA tour
Ted Mosby writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 11:54:29 AM

@VDODSON
If you actually watched the 2nd movie... It's pretty clear that it wasn't "horse piss" that Pontius drank haha
SACdaddy writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 11:56:26 AM

I still cant watch that scene.
MoneyHayabusa writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 12:13:37 PM

I dunno if its good to see Bam alive. His show was such a f*cking POS. Also, I was smiling in Nitro Circus when he slammed the corner of a ramp being dragged by a four wheeler... may your lambo be crushed by a cement truck, Bam (with you in it)
Goober3000 writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 12:20:39 PM

@SacDaddy Touche' im not realy racist I just wanted to use this moment to say the couple of racist jokes I know...I'm done though...think I might go kill myself now because I want to go live on Pandora....not realy....just drank too much beer
SACdaddy writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 12:31:25 PM

No problems here man. Most people on this site know by now that I'm far from a racist too. I just like to join the fun sometimes. Its all in good fun as long as it doesn't get personal. You're good.
skatemaster62 writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 12:42:39 PM

holy f*ck dude got f*cked up worse then dandy on a friday night with his dad in a fle bag motel
Ranger writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 1:15:54 PM

@Goober - you're a valued poster here on WP. The only thing unfunny about racist jokes are apologizing for them.

The Bro's on here are cool (except for... WTF is that idiot's name??? From the MLK (lol... still laughing over 'Chocolate MILK!') - OHHHH... COC! Yeah, he's a douche-bag).

You have a funny racial joke... let 'er rip!

(insert: brake-dancing, car stealing joke here).
GIST writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 1:38:53 PM

@SACdaddy

What do you call a 100 white women chasing one black guy on the PGA tour?

Tiger Woods.

No sex in the champagne room for that guy.
GIST writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 1:40:21 PM

Bam's a great stunt man, but sh*t skater.
Kurskij writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 2:04:13 PM

Bam Margera is a Mess After "Jackass 3D" Shoot


What was he before?
Kurskij writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 2:07:52 PM

- What’s red, black, red, black, red, black, red and white?
- Wesley Snipes masturbating himself!
lawman writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 2:12:34 PM

Whens the only time you smile at a black guy?
lawman writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 2:13:56 PM

Whats red, black, yellow, blue and hangs in my front yard?


Hes my n*gger and Ill paint him any color I want!
Peter Parker writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 2:18:27 PM

Q: What's the difference between a black baby and a white baby?

A: About 10 minutes in the microwave.
Peter Parker writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 2:18:53 PM

Q: What do you call a black priest?

A: Holy sh*t.
Peter Parker writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 2:19:51 PM

Q: Why do black people smell?

A: So blind people can hate them too.
Peter Parker writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 2:21:29 PM

Hey, SAC, replying to your NBA joke:

Q: Why are black people the best in basketball?

A: Because they can steal, shoot and run.
Peter Parker writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 2:22:47 PM

Q: What would you call the Flinstones if they were black?

A: The n*ggers.
Peter Parker writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 2:23:34 PM

Q: What do you call a black person on a bike?

A: A thief.
SACdaddy writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 2:24:26 PM

What's he doin hangin in your yard Lawman? You do have the right to ask him to leave you know. No wonder you're so angry :-)
Peter Parker writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 2:24:50 PM

Q: A Mexican and a black guy are in a car, who's driving?

A: The police.
Peter Parker writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 2:29:43 PM

Q: What does a black man say when he has diarrhea?

A: I'm meeelting!
Peter Parker writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 2:30:55 PM

Q: Whats long, dark and smells like sh*t?

A: The unemployment line.
SACdaddy writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 2:31:13 PM

Thx for chiming in Parker. I was starting to get worried. While you're here:

What's white and fourteen inches long?

Absolutely nothing!

What do you call 500,000 white guys jumping out of a plane?

Snow

What do you call a bunch of white guys in a circle?

A c*ck ring


Why do so many white people get lost skiing?

It's hard to find them in the snow.

What did they white guy do before his blood test?

He studied.

How long does it take for a white women to take a crap???

9 months

What's the difference between a white man and a snake?

One is a evil, cold-blooded, venomous, slimy creature of Satan, and the other is a snake.

How many white men does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

One, white men will screw anything.

What's the flattest surface to iron your jeans on?

A white girl's ass.

LOL!!! who knew this could be so fun :-)

Peter Parker writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 2:31:40 PM

Q: How do you kill a n*gger?

A: Throw a bucket of KFC off a cliff.
Peter Parker writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 2:34:45 PM

LOL!

This is officially the most hilarious post on WP since C.O.C.'s gang rape!

Ok, let's keep this alive!

(weeeeeeeeee...)
Peter Parker writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 2:35:32 PM

Q: How do you starve a n*gger?

A: Hide his welfare check in his work boots.
Peter Parker writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 2:35:57 PM

Q: Whats the difference between a n*gger and a speed bump?

A: You slow down for the speed bump.
Peter Parker writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 2:36:33 PM

Q: What does a black kid get for Christmas?

A: Your bike.
Peter Parker writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 2:38:03 PM

Q: What do you call a n*gger with a wodden leg?

A: sh*t on a stick.
Kurskij writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 2:38:37 PM

five black guys fell of a clif in a cadillac. what's sad about the story?

the cadillac takes six
Kurskij writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 2:39:38 PM

@PP
Q: How do you kill a n*gger?

A: Throw a bucket of KFC off a cliff.

Q: So why so sad?

A: I'm against animal cruelty.

Peter Parker writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 2:39:50 PM

Q: Why do n*ggers always have sex on there minds?

A: Because they have pubic hair on their heads.
Kurskij writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 2:40:45 PM

q: what's the point of white chocolate?

a: so the blacks could get dirty
Kurskij writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 2:40:47 PM

q: what's the point of white chocolate?

a: so the blacks could get dirty
Kurskij writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 2:41:36 PM

q: what's the difference between a pigeon and a n*gger?

a: pigeons can be white, but n*ggers can't fly
Peter Parker writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 2:41:56 PM

Q: Why are n*ggers getting stronger?

A: Because T.V's are getting bigger.
Peter Parker writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 2:42:30 PM

Q: What's faster than a n*gger running with your T.V?

A: His brother with the VCR.
Kurskij writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 2:43:06 PM

aaaand a little step to the other side:

BJ: - Yo mamma’s so big, she looks just like Godzilla!
Peter Parker writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 2:43:12 PM

Q: How do you save a n*gger from drowning?

A: You don't.
Kurskij writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 2:45:31 PM

q: can you see the difference between two n*ggers?

a: can you see the difference between two piles of sh*t?
Kurskij writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 2:47:34 PM


Q: How do you save a n*gger from drowning?

A: You take your foot off his head.


Peter Parker writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 2:54:24 PM

@ Kurskij:

LOL! We should use some other thread to do momma jokes too!
This is just too much fun!
Kurskij writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 3:01:00 PM

@PP
Why not the Potter thread? Damn, no black news at all today.

q: how do you call a n*gger who brings bad news?

a: a dead n*gger
CCBlev writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 3:02:56 PM

lil timmy found dad's can of white paint, he thought to himself, i wonder what it would be like to be white so he painted himeself white. He goes inside and says to his mom, "mom i'm a white man" She responds" timmy you should be ashamed of yourself, go showe your father what you did."
So timmy goes in and shows his dad " damn i can't beleive you painted yourself white, go inside and wash your self off, your grounded." Timmy responds " Dad I've only been white for 5 mins and I already hates n*ggers!"
Kurskij writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 3:03:05 PM

Yo mama's so fat she got arrested at the airport for carrying 200 pounds of crack.
Kurskij writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 3:03:15 PM

^also she was black
Kurskij writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 3:04:19 PM

@CCBlev

That' an Oscar material, damn it! Spike Lee should film it.
Kurskij writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 3:05:39 PM

King Kong and Oprah Winfrey

Q. What did King Kong say to Oprah Winfrey?
A. "Is it in?
Peter Parker writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 3:16:15 PM

King Kong and Oprah... LOL!

Q: Why do n*ggers cry during sex?

A: The mace.
encoreyourface writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 3:17:08 PM

cool, now we get to see peoples do weird thing with their nuts right in are faces ...

i tried watching the first one, and it was crap.
Peter Parker writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 3:17:09 PM

Q: How do you get a n*gger out of a tree?

A: Cut the rope.
Peter Parker writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 3:18:14 PM

Q: What do you get when you cross a n*gger and a spic?

A: Someone too lazy to steal.
Peter Parker writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 3:18:46 PM

Q: Why don't n*ggers take aspirin?

A: They refuse to pick the cotton out.
Peter Parker writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 3:20:02 PM

Q: Why don't n*gger kids play in the sandbox?

A: Cats keep covering them up.
CCBlev writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 3:20:11 PM

whats the differance between a dead dog in the road and a dead n*gger in the road?
The dead dog has skid marks leading up to it.
Peter Parker writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 3:20:45 PM

Q: What do you call an apartment full of n*ggers?

A: COON-dominium.
CCBlev writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 3:21:50 PM

A white man, an indian, and a black man were sitting around talking one day. The indian declared, "We were once many but now we are few!". The black man said proudly, "We were once few but now we are many!!" The white man laughed and replied, "That's cause we haven't played cowboys and n*ggers yet!!
CCBlev writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 3:22:35 PM

The Reverend Jessie Jackson and Mike Tyson are both in Rome, Italy and they decide to go to the Vatican to see the Pope and get blessed. Jessie Jackson walks into the Vatican wearing an expensive suit, while Mike Tyson is wearing shorts, a muscle shirt, and he is eating sunflower seeds and spitting the shells on the floor. Jessie Jackson approaches the Pope first and asks him for his blessing, but the Pope ignores him. Jessie Jackson asks the Pope a second time just in case the Pope did not hear his first request, but this time the Pope brushes him off and walks away. Jessie Jackson gets pissed off and walks back to where Mike Tyson is standing and tells him what happened. Mike decides to give it a shot, so he walks up to the Pope eating his sunflower seeds and spitting the shells on the floor.
In utter disgust Jessie Jackson watches the Pope make the sign of the cross with his hand at Mike Tyson. As they are leaving Jessie says, "I can't believe the Pope blessed you. I wore my best suit and I'm a Reverend, and you walk into the Vatican eating sunflower seeds and looking like you just came from the gym." Mike Tyson looks at Jessie and says, "He didn't bless me. The Pope pointed at me and said, 'Hey you', he then pointed at the ground and said, 'Pick up those sun flower seeds', he pointed at the door and said, 'Get the f*ck out of here', and then he point at you and said, 'and take your n*gger friend with you'."
Peter Parker writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 3:22:43 PM

Q: How do you babysit a niglet?
A: Wet his lips and stick him to the wall.

Q: How do you get him down?
A: Teach him to say "Motherf*cker."

Q: How else do you babysit a niglet?
A: Put Velcro on the ceiling and tell him to jump.

Q: How do you get him down?
A: Invite the spics over, blindfold them and tell them it's a piñata party.
Lowryder writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 3:23:13 PM

someone plz tell me how they are already done filming when it only started 1 week ago?!
Peter Parker writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 3:24:08 PM

Q: What is a n*gger?

A: Proof that skunks f*ck monkeys.
CCBlev writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 3:24:13 PM

What's the difference between Batman and a black man?
A. Batman can go out at night without Robin.

CCBlev writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 3:24:21 PM

What's the difference between Batman and a black man? Batman can go out at night without Robin.

Peter Parker writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 3:25:50 PM

Q: A n*gger and a spic jump off the Empire State Building, who hits the ground first?

A: Nobody cares.
CCBlev writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 3:26:07 PM

What's the difference between white fairy tales and black fairy tales?
White fairy tales start with, "Once upon a time..." Black fairy tales start with, "Yo, you motherf*ckers ain't gonna believe this sh*t
CCBlev writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 3:27:13 PM

A man named Tom went to his local country club to discover that they invested in some robots to aid the golfers. Tom tested out a robot and found that with it, his score lowered 20 points. He was very impressed. So the following week, he went back to find that they were no longer there. He went into the pro shop and asked, "What happened to the robots you had last week?".
The clerk said, "Well, we had to get rid of them because the sun was reflecting into golfers eyes so they couldn't see."

Tom said, "Oh, well, why didn't you paint them."

He said, "Well, we did... We painted them black, and two of them didn't show up for work, and we caught a bunch more stealing sh*t."
Peter Parker writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 3:27:19 PM

Q: What's the most confusing day in Harlem?

A: Father's Day.
Peter Parker writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 3:27:57 PM

Q: What do you call a n*gger with a Harvard education?

A: n*gger.
CCBlev writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 3:28:19 PM

A black man walked into a bar with a parrot on his shoulder.
The bartender said, "That's beautiful! Where did you get that?"
The parrot replied, "Africa."
encoreyourface writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 3:28:38 PM

Q:how many n*ggers does it take to shingle a house?

A:depends on how thin you slice 'em!!
Peter Parker writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 3:29:05 PM

Q: Why don't n*gger women wear panties to picnics?

A: To keep the flies off the chicken.
CCBlev writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 3:29:54 PM

Why can't Ray Charles read?
Because he's black!
Peter Parker writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 3:30:34 PM

Q: What do n*ggers and sperm have in common?

A: One in a million works.
CCBlev writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 3:30:46 PM

A black boy came home from school one day crying. His mother asked him why he was crying and he said, "All the boys at school were laughing at the size of my penis. They said it was the biggest in the third grade."
Then he asked his mother, "Is it because I'm black." and she replied, "No, it's because you're eighteen."

Peter Parker writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 3:31:27 PM

Q: What do you call Mike Tyson with no arms?

A: Niger! n*gger! n*gger!
SACdaddy writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 3:31:32 PM

@CCBLEV: that one always kills me! I've always heard it using baby powder though.

What do you get when you cross a white supremist with a donkey?

--Someone who thinks the sun shines out of their own ass.

What do you call white on white crime?

--Slow dancing

What do you call a white guy with two sheep under each arm?

--A PIMP!

Why are white women always looking for black men?

-- because all the white ones are in the closet

What do you call a white people car show?

--A trailer park

Why did white peolpe need black people to pick cotton?

sh*t, because white people are too weak to pick that heavy cotton....pussies!

To be honest with you, me and my coworkers are getting close to running out over here. Apparently white people have been up to this a lot longer than black people and have amassed volumes of minority jokes on the net over the years. All I've got left are some nationality jokes (Irish, Polish, etc.) and a ton of "you might be a redneck" crap. Oh well, it was fun while it lasted.
Peter Parker writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 3:32:24 PM

Q: Why do police dogs lick their ass?

A: To get the taste of n*gger out of their mouth.
CCBlev writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 3:32:31 PM

What did Abe Lincoln say after his 3 day drunk spell?
I freed who?!
Peter Parker writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 3:32:48 PM

Q: What can a pizza do that a n*gger can't?

A: Feed a family of four.
Peter Parker writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 3:34:34 PM

Q: What is black, red, green, yellow, orange, purple and pink?

A: A n*gger dressed for church.
CCBlev writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 3:36:03 PM

@sacdaddy
those are some good ones, i never really have got to hear too many white jokes
Peter Parker writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 3:36:32 PM

Q: What do you get when you cross a n*gger with a gorilla?

A: A stupid gorilla.
SACdaddy writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 3:36:39 PM

@CCBLEV: was refering to your first joke btw.
CCBlev writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 3:36:48 PM

Why did so many blacks die in Vietnam?
When the sergeant said, "Get down!", they all got up and started dancing.
Peter Parker writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 3:38:04 PM

Q: What do you say to a black man in uniform?

A: "I'll have a Big Mac and a coke."
CCBlev writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 3:38:32 PM

Whats the differance between a hard working n*gger and bigfoot?
Bigfoot's been spotted!
Peter Parker writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 3:39:57 PM

Q: Who were the three most famous black women in history?

A: Aunt Jemima, Diana Ross, and Mother f*cker!
SACdaddy writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 3:40:02 PM

Thx PP. Guess that's just one more thing for us poor niggaz to gripe about :-)
CCBlev writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 3:40:27 PM

There was a black guy and a white guy debating over whether Jesus was white or black. They couldn't agree, so they went to ask God.
God answered, "I AM WHO I AM!!!"
The white guy said to the black guy, "That solves it. Jesus is white."
The confused black guy said, "What?"
The white guy replied, "Well, if Jesus was black then he would have answered, 'I IS WHO I IS!'"
Peter Parker writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 3:40:33 PM

Q: What do Stevie Wonder and Ray Charles have in common?

A: They're both n*ggers.
CCBlev writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 3:42:24 PM

Once again Leroy was asked to do a simple homework assignment. Still befuddled by the whole school thing, Leroy is a trooper. He was given another set of vocabulary words to use in sentences. Here's what he handed in:

1. HONOR ROLL - We was playin poker on the stoop the other day, man I was HONOROLL.
2. PLANET - I got me some seed to grow weed, so I PLANET in the backyard.
3. DISMAY - I went for a blood test, the doctor pulled out a big needle. He said, "DISMAY hurt a little."
4. OMELETTE - Every time I start a new job, OMELETTE go after a week.
5. STAIRWAY - When me and my homies get high, we STAIRWAY into space.
6. MOBILE - I went to buy crack, I was short on cash, my man said, "Gimme one MOBILE."
7. DEFENSE - I ran from the cops, and hopped DEFENSE and got away.
8. AFRO - I got so mad at my bitch, AFRO a lamp at her.
9. AFTERMATH - I like to be high in school, so AFTERMATH I go to the field and smoke weed.
10. LOCKET - I slam the door so hard, I LOCKET.
11. DOMINEERING - My girly's birthday was yesterday, I got her a DOMINEERING.
12. KENYA - I needed change fo the subway, so I axe a stranger KENYA spare some change.
13. DERANGE - DERANGE is where da deer and antelope play.
14. DATA - At my basketball game, I scored thirty points. My coach said, "DATA boy!"
15. COPULATE - I called 911 and an hour later when they show up, I said, "COPULATE!"
16. FASCINATE - My girly's titties are so big. Her shirt has ten buttons, she can only FASCINATE.
17. BEWARE - I asked the man at the unemployment office, "Is this BEWARE I get a job?"
18. DIMENSION - I be tall, dark, handsome and not DIMENSION hung like a horse.
19. COATROOM - The judge said, "One more outburst like that, and you'll be thrown out the COATROOM."
20. DECIDE - I like Wanda and Yolanda, but I like to have a couple of bitches on DECIDE.

Peter Parker writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 3:43:34 PM

@ SAC:

You know what I'm just dying for now?
Some stupid sh*t to come, take this out of context and start accusing people here of racism.


You hear (read) that, C.O.C.? That one's for you, stupid sh*t!
CCBlev writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 3:43:59 PM

Why were there only 49 contestants in the Miss Ebonics contest?
Because no one wanted to wear the sash that said I-DA-HO!!!


CCBlev writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 3:45:12 PM

@pp
I was thinking the same thing, it could be interesting
SACdaddy writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 3:48:36 PM

What do you call a white guy in the hood?

-- LOST

What do you call a white guy selling drugs in the hood?

--FBI

I heard that Rockstar Games was developing a video game based on Angelina Jolie and Madonna's "humanity" missions to Africa.

--They were gonna call it "Grand Theft Negro"
CCBlev writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 3:48:50 PM

A guy walks into a bar down in Alabama and orders a Grape Nehi.
Surprised, the bartender looks around and says, "You ain't from around here. Where you from, boy?"
The guy replies, "I'm from Pennsylvania."
The bartender asks, "What do you do up in Pennsylvania?"
The guy responds, "I'm a taxidermist."
The bartender asks, "A taxidermist! What the hell is a taxidermist?"
The guy says "I mount dead animals."
The bartender smiles and shouts to the whole bar, "It's OK boys, he's one of us!"
SACdaddy writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 3:53:20 PM

I here you PP. It does look bad from the outside looking in but who gives a f*ck. Something tells me that most these aren't rolling off the tops anyone's head. Well maybe Lawman, but with such a sh*tty job who can blame him :-)
SACdaddy writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 3:53:59 PM

"hear" lol cue the dumb nigga jokes
Kurskij writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 3:57:12 PM

Black Jesus:

I rode into town on an ass... Yo momma's ass!
CCBlev writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 4:00:50 PM

@Kurskij
Welcome back we missed you, and I was out of jokes too
Kurskij writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 4:01:46 PM

q: what do you say if you hit a n*gger with a car?

a: sh*t happens.
Kurskij writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 4:04:16 PM

@CCBlev

Thanks, man ).

q: how do you get a n*gger out of a tree?

a: you cut a rope.

Kurskij writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 4:05:51 PM

Q: What does Alabama sheriff call a n*gger who had been shot 30 times?

A: Worst case of suicide we've ever seen...
Kurskij writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 4:08:13 PM

Q: What do you call 50 n*ggers at the bottom of the sea?

A: Good start
Kurskij writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 4:09:02 PM

also

Yo momma's so hairy she's got afros on her nipples
Kurskij writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 4:12:17 PM

Q: What do n*ggers and sperm have in common?

A: Only one in a million actualy works.
Kurskij writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 4:16:29 PM

Q: How did a white boy walked out of grocery with a six-pack?

A: He came in and paid for it.
Kurskij writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 4:17:24 PM

Q: How long does it take for a white woman to take a sh*t?

A: Nine months
Kurskij writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 4:18:26 PM

And here's a neutral one:

Q: How do you call a white man in court?

A: A lawyer
Peter Parker writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 4:22:51 PM

... OK, inspired by yours, Kurskij:

Q: What do you call a black man in court?
A: Defendant.

Q: What do you call a black lawyer?
A: n*gger.
Kurskij writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 4:24:44 PM

Richard Nixon said “I am not a crook!”

Barack Obama says “I am not on crack!”
Kurskij writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 4:26:08 PM

A black guy walks into a bar with a beautiful parrot on his shoulder.

“Wow”, - says the bartender, - “That is really something, where did you get it?”

“Africa”, - says the parrot.
Kurskij writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 4:27:44 PM

Q: Why there were no n*ggers on jetsons?

A: Because the future looks good.
FBO writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 4:28:27 PM

He's such a whinny little bitch girl. Dunn was the star of Viva La Bam
Kurskij writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 4:28:30 PM

Q: How to solve a transportation problem in Harlem?

A: Move the trees closer together.
Kurskij writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 4:30:20 PM

Q: What do you call a barn full of blacks?

A: Farm equipment.
Kurskij writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 4:31:29 PM

@PP

Q: What do you call a n*gger in a three piece suit?

A: Will the defendant please rise.
Kurskij writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 4:32:10 PM

Q: What do you call a black lawyer?

A: Denzel
Lowryder writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 4:33:15 PM

Q. What's the difference between a n*gger and a snow tire?
A.A snow tire doesn't sing when you put chains on it.
Lowryder writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 4:34:20 PM

Q. what do you call 100 n*ggers running down a hill?
A. a mudslide
Lowryder writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 4:34:46 PM

Q. What did the Alabama sherriff call the n*gger who had been shot 15 times?
A. Worst case of suicide he had ever seen.
Lowryder writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 4:36:35 PM

Q.Why dont you run over a black kids bike in your car?
A. Because it might be yours.
Kurskij writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 4:40:41 PM

Q: What do niigers and apples have in common?

A: Both look good hanging from the trees
Kurskij writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 4:42:14 PM

Q: What word starts with N and ends with R you never want to call a n*gger?

A: Neighbor
Kurskij writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 4:43:23 PM

Q: How come all n*ggers are fast?

A: The slow ones are in jail
encoreyourface writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 4:44:45 PM

everybody-those are pretty good n*gger jokes! keep it up!
Kurskij writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 4:45:01 PM

Fair play:

Q: Why is it hard to find jokes that a racist against whites.

A: Damn, nigga, cause being white is bad nuff!
skatemaster62 writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 4:45:23 PM

do you guys know what sound a dirtbike makes? run nigga nigga nigga nigga run nigga nigga nigga
Kurskij writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 4:46:40 PM

Q: What do you do if you see a black man flopping around on the ground?

A: Stop laughing and reload
encoreyourface writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 4:47:05 PM

Q:what do you call a n*gger with nice cloths?

A:a thief
CCBlev writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 4:49:20 PM

Whats the American Dream?
For every n*gger to swim back Africa with a fag and a jew under each arm!
skatemaster62 writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 4:51:33 PM

last night i woke up and i couldnt belive my eyes! my tv was floating in mid air

then i fliped the light on "god damit dejoun put my tv back and get outta my house nigga"!!!
Lowryder writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 4:51:58 PM

@skatemaster62, ur dumb. its a chainsaw not a dirtbike
Kurskij writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 4:52:15 PM

Yo momma's ass so huge she takes 5 rows in a cinema

Yo momma's so fat when she steps on a scale it reads "One at a time please"

Yo momma's so ugly when two men broke into her house she screamed RAAAPE! And they shot each other.

Yo momma's so fat when she fell down the stairs it caused an earthquake

Yo momma's ass is so big she sits down she's three feet taller.

Ok. Thanks for the wonderful evening and that fancy french wine!

Kurskij out.
Lowryder writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 4:56:12 PM

Q. A black guy walks into a bar with a beatiful parrot on his shoulder. "Wow," says the bartender. "That is really something. Where'd you get it?"

A. "Africa," says the parrot.
Lowryder writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 4:56:30 PM

A black woman was filling out forms at the welfare office. Under "Number of children," she wrote "10," and where it said "List names of children," she wrote "Leroy." When she handed in the form, the woman behind the desk pointed out: "Now here where it says "List names of children," you're supposed to write the names of each one of your children." "Dey all named Leroy," said the black woman. "That's very unusual. When you call them, how do they know which one you want?" asked the welfare worker. "Oh, den I uses the last names."
CCBlev writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 5:15:14 PM

How many posts so far on this thread? Can we beat 250? I think we got every n*gger joke on the planet on here, lets move on, Asian jokes anyone?
SACdaddy writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 5:27:09 PM

And the hits keep coming:

Why are there so many white stay at home moms?

--Well that Meth that isn't gonna cook itself!!!

A Mexican, a black, and a white guy are in a bar having a drink when a good-looking girl comes up to them and says "whoever can say liver and cheese in a sentence can have me". So the white guy says"I love liver and cheese." she says "that's not good enough." The black says "I hate liver and cheese", and she says "that's notcreative", and then the Mexican says "liver alone cheese mine."

What's the difference between a black and a white fairy tale?

--A white one starts off with "Once upon a time...".
A black one starts off with "Yo ass ain't gonna believe dis sh*t...

A white missionary is sent into deepest darkest depths of Africa to live with a tribe. He spends years with the people, teaching them to read, write and good Christian values. One thing he particularly stresses is the evil of sexual sin. "Thou must not commit adultery or fornication!" One day the wife of one of the tribe's noblemen gives birth to a white baby. The village is shocked and the chief is sent by his people to talk with the missionary. The chief confronts him and says, "You have taught us of the evils of sexual sin, yet here a black woman gives birth to a white child. You are the only white man who has ever set foot in our village. Anyone can see what's going on here!!!" The missionary replies, "No, no, my good man. You are mistaken. What you have here is a natural occurrence - what is called an albino. Look to thy yonder field. See a field of white sheep, and yet amongst them is one black one. Nature does this on occasion. The chief pauses for a moment then says, "Tell you what, you don't say anything about the sheep, and I won't say anything about the white baby."





lawman writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 5:32:37 PM

Two guys are working high steel on the 35th floor of a building. a white guy and a black guy. The white guy leans over and says, "you know, with this wind blowing just right, like it is, you could jump off of this building, loop around the flag pole down there and come right back up to this floor". The black guys says "no way. thats bull sh*t". So the white guy does just that, pops back next to the black guy and smiles saying "i told you". So the black guy is amazed and does it. He immidiatly falls to his death. When the police are investigating, a rookie cop states "poor bastard, jumped for no good reason". a seasoned detective looks at him and shakes his head. "no son, superman is a racist and hes f*cking with the n*ggers again"!!!
SACdaddy writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 5:41:21 PM

@Lawman: LOL!!! Nothing beats racist Superman.
lawman writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 5:44:04 PM

SAC>>> You know what amazes me? The fact that we all act like childeren on this site, yet are apparently mature enough to realize these are JOKES! and we can keep telling them without someone getting all bent up! Yet someone like Al Sharpton or David Duke, who claim to be important, educated people, would look at this as racial discord! America, take this as a lesson, if racism REALLY doesnt existm, it doesnt f*ckING MATTER what people say! Everyone on here knows I am a cop, its no secret, I would give CPR to a dying person REGARDLESS f color. BUT there are some people I would not think twice about not fully pinching the nose closed, and that is based on ANYTHING but color! People that suck, SUCK period. Black, white, yellow, whatever, if your a douche, youre a douche!
lawman writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 5:45:48 PM

SAC>>>> BTW, how could my job possibly suck? It completely revolves aroound placing your people in jail! I would PAY my dept. to work here! LOL
CCBlev writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 5:45:53 PM

Dandy's momma is so ugly when she was born they threw her in the trash and they tried to keep the after birth.
The bitch is so ugly she could scare a vulture off a gut wagon
CCBlev writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 5:47:49 PM

Where's Ranger been at all day? It aint the smae without him comenting on this.
CCBlev writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 5:48:40 PM

f*ck if i can spell too
SACdaddy writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 5:53:18 PM

And we love ya back Lawman. At least we know you wont be one of the suicides I hear come with the profession. Gotta love what you do :-)
blinkbomber writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 5:55:54 PM

"180455793897" - worst line i've ever read from WP

just saying.
lawman writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 5:56:42 PM

SAC>>> I think its the hopelessness of it that gets some of us. Seeing some of the sh*t we see is rough. Kids are the worste part! Its like being in Iraq, but instead of a year its usually 20yrs. It wears on some of the guys.
blinkbomber writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 5:57:02 PM

^^* "It's good to see that Bam is alive" *^^

my bad, but that other line sucked too, lol
SACdaddy writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 6:07:52 PM

@lawman: That's pretty much what I was refering too when I said the job was sh*tty, but I hear you.

Can't believe a Bam post turned into this lol!!! Nice way to set it off! Only on WP.
lawman writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 6:09:24 PM

SAC>>>> Yeah man only on WP. BTW, i know its a rifle but your guy looks like hes playing a f*cking fiddle!
SACdaddy writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 6:26:47 PM

@lawman: LOL! Its just a picture. He could be the next Charlie Daniels if you want him to be.
encoreyourface writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 6:45:39 PM

@Lawman- didn't know you where a cop ... you're not gonna arrest for banging Brittany Murphy's dead body, are you?
encoreyourface writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 6:49:29 PM

Q: What do you call 1,000 n*gger's on a plane back to Africa?

A: A good start.

Q: What's long and hard on a black man?

A: The first grade
Lowryder writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 6:53:27 PM

ok so on a plane is a priest, the worlds smartest n*gger, and a boyscout and the plane is about to crash and there are only 2 parachutes. the worlds smartest n*gger says that he needs to educate other blacks so he jumps out, and the priest tells the boy scout that he can have the last chute. the little boy scout says, "we can both go, the smartest n*gger just jumped out with my backpack"
Lowryder writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 6:55:18 PM

@encoreyourface lol urs reminded me of one...
Q. what is big that a n*gger has?
A. chapstick
encoreyourface writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 7:04:07 PM

lol.
murphyslaw93 writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 9:47:52 PM

Haha sweet, Jackass 2 is one of my favorite comedies, it outdid the already great first one which outdid the show in my opinion. I hope Tremaine and Knoxville & Company can make the third one even better. Im excited.

I might pass on the 3D though, it doesnt seem that appealing to have Wee-Man's balls looking "as I can touch them"
murphyslaw93 writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 9:48:42 PM

Haha sweet, Jackass 2 is one of my favorite comedies, it outdid the already great first one which outdid the show in my opinion. I hope Tremaine and Knoxville & Company can make the third one even better. Im excited.

I might pass on the 3D though, it doesnt seem that appealing to have Wee-Man's balls looking "so real its as if I can touch them"
Effector writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 10:58:59 PM

Margera Rocks.
Effector writes:
on February 5th, 2010 at 11:02:12 PM

get a life vdodson! u take it personal its your probl. its a good f*cking laugh! f*ck yea Margera Rulz
warriors187 writes:
on February 6th, 2010 at 12:44:58 AM

haha gotta love WorstPreviews!!
TeemSelami writes:
on February 6th, 2010 at 1:02:25 AM

@SAC you usually make me laugh but I'm loving the ironing the jeans one, holy goddamn.
SACdaddy writes:
on February 6th, 2010 at 1:46:41 AM

Oh sh*t, getting f*cked up with a few of my closest "pigmently challenged" (Crackers is not the preferred nomenclature) friends, and we're having a blast rereading these f*cking racist jokes. The Abe Lincoln freeing the slaves joke still has most of us in tears right now. We may have a few new members in the making if these idiots don't get so baked they forget the name of the website.

@teemSelami: Glad I could return the favor. Your post usually have me rolling.
Peter Parker writes:
on February 6th, 2010 at 2:17:12 AM

... nigga sistas usually have me rolling too!

(Ha!)
SACdaddy writes:
on February 6th, 2010 at 2:27:43 AM

Yeah got you rollin in ass PP you booty freak. There's one over here with your name written all over her. Oh wait at minute, that's MY name written all over her. Good night douchebags!
Peter Parker writes:
on February 6th, 2010 at 2:39:39 AM

@ SAC:

It's official... I hate you! Ya ear me, mister?

Shove a fist up the girl's booty for me, OK bud?

Have a good one.
GIST writes:
on February 6th, 2010 at 4:24:48 AM

It's funny if anybody was to ever visit this site, to read this specific article, and then read the following comments.
They would be "What the f*ck? How did it get to Bam almost dying to Chuck Norris being a black guy who deals crack to white girls with tabletop asses?"
baarni writes:
on February 6th, 2010 at 8:35:32 PM

How do you turn a black guy white??


Beat the sh*t out of him. HA!
lostwarrior writes:
on February 7th, 2010 at 9:57:09 AM

oh just die already. its not that hard to top having a gold dildo being shoved up your ass. Imean vin tops what Bam did in jack ass two everynite, just ask vin's dad...

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