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Iron Josh writes:
on November 24th, 2009 at 6:43:27 PM
Sometimes the joke just writes itself.
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KirkLazerus writes:
on November 24th, 2009 at 6:45:33 PM
i hope it spreads like a disease, so lame teenage woman stop watching Twilight
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JonDrama writes:
on November 24th, 2009 at 6:47:13 PM
Fucking Hysterical.... He couldn't take how bad New Moon is
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TheHundreds writes:
on November 24th, 2009 at 6:50:48 PM
haha
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jeffw1978 writes:
on November 24th, 2009 at 6:51:41 PM
Ranger I thought you were supposed to be discreet! Stay away from the cameras
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Ranger writes:
on November 24th, 2009 at 6:55:21 PM
I know! HOW EXACTLY does this make me a pervert?!?!?!
@Kirk - from your words to God's eyes!
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Ranger writes:
on November 24th, 2009 at 6:56:54 PM
"Every so often if I said something or my friend said something he would lean back and make a sexual comment that was very unnecessary and not needed," ----- U know what else isn't 'needed'?! TALKING DURING A FUCKING MOVIE YOU BITCH!!!!!!
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Peter Parker writes:
on November 24th, 2009 at 6:57:25 PM
So, old vampires are cool in the movie, but not so cool in real life?
Damn teenagers and their double standards!
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goat1202 writes:
on November 24th, 2009 at 6:58:06 PM
Wonder what this "perv" would have done after watching Bruno??
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Ranger writes:
on November 24th, 2009 at 6:59:15 PM
Ironically your name is 'goat' and you're asking that?
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pomme writes:
on November 24th, 2009 at 7:00:35 PM
another reason not to see the (awful) movie:be careful on perverts!
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Ranger writes:
on November 24th, 2009 at 7:03:31 PM
Just wait...
The story will break that I have offered cash to the little girls leaving the theater for their soaked panties...
I'll probably get labeled a 'pervert' for that too!
FUCK THIS WORLD!!!!
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goat1202 writes:
on November 24th, 2009 at 7:04:09 PM
lol@ranger for making goat1202 lol@goat1202
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Ranger writes:
on November 24th, 2009 at 7:04:54 PM
I have my Velcro gloves my friend.
Just waiting to be baaaaaaaddddd!!!!
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Lowryder writes:
on November 24th, 2009 at 7:09:47 PM
omg i live in grand rapids michigan, right down the road from where this happend haha
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SpookyCupcakes writes:
on November 24th, 2009 at 7:10:02 PM
good, I hope she learns her lesson to NOT TALK DURING A FUCKING MOVIE.
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Ranger writes:
on November 24th, 2009 at 7:10:32 PM
And you're 45 and smell like a sweating teenager?
HAWT!
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Peter Parker writes:
on November 24th, 2009 at 7:26:12 PM
She's still wondering if she became immortal, though...
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jeffw1978 writes:
on November 24th, 2009 at 7:30:50 PM
The going rate is 5 bucks for the soaked panties. Not that I know that for sure or anything.
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jeffw1978 writes:
on November 24th, 2009 at 7:31:30 PM
Shes lucky he just bit her he could have stuck his C*ck in her mouth to shut her up
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Ranger writes:
on November 24th, 2009 at 7:32:42 PM
Yeah... those finger-puppets get pretty vocal if you go for their bum first run outta the gate.
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jeffw1978 writes:
on November 24th, 2009 at 7:35:08 PM
lol
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Peter Parker writes:
on November 24th, 2009 at 7:37:12 PM
"OK, mister, I'll do it. But you promise I'll become immortal, right?"
"Sure, hun! Immortal... yeah..."
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Mighte Migit writes:
on November 24th, 2009 at 7:43:04 PM
wow wat a fuckin retarded perv
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dandythelion writes:
on November 24th, 2009 at 7:49:53 PM
first of all watching Twilight falls under the FREE WILL category. (as does bitching about it, but thats my point) So acknowledge the tweens rights to obsess over anything they want.
AND take a lesson from your fanboy messiah KEVIN SMITH. - The TWILIGHT TWEENS are the equivilant to any of you faggot ass nerds at comic con and pretty soon those tweens will be 18 year old girls into vampires..elevating all of you pussies chances of finally losing your virginity to someone other than your father.
i don't even understand the hate for this film i FAKED liking it and got crazy pussy. I actually got laid after taking a girl to see New Moon.
what is wrong with all you fucking queers?
disclaimer...im actually fond of gay people and am only using derogatory terms to anger you homophobic nerds.
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Ranger writes:
on November 24th, 2009 at 7:55:12 PM
My goodness dandy... you got laid. Congrats. Did the little boy tell his Mommy & Daddy?
And yet again, you seem to talk a lot about: queers, gays, fags, dick...
Thank God when your sex change is complete you'll have something else to waggle besides your tongue.
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Mighte Migit writes:
on November 24th, 2009 at 7:59:12 PM
@ranger lol
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minkowski writes:
on November 24th, 2009 at 8:03:28 PM
The 45 year old guy probably has AIDS and though the 'girl', with her short, dowdy hair and dark emo makeup, was just some other log-humping homo dude.
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MovieFanAttic writes:
on November 24th, 2009 at 8:08:45 PM
First Question: What the hell is a 45 year old doing watching a teen movie?
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Ranger writes:
on November 24th, 2009 at 8:09:41 PM
Ahhh... biting girls (haven't you been reading?)!
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minkowski writes:
on November 24th, 2009 at 8:29:41 PM
"First Question: What the hell is a 45 year old doing watching a teen movie?"
Someone had to take Dandythelion out for a chick flick. Who better than his father?
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minkowski writes:
on November 24th, 2009 at 8:30:36 PM
"disclaimer...im actually fond of gay people and am only using derogatory terms to anger you homophobic nerds."
That's like saying, I'm not gay, but my boyfriend is.
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Ranger writes:
on November 24th, 2009 at 8:30:47 PM
Bwwwahahahahahahahhahaha!!!!
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Ranger writes:
on November 24th, 2009 at 8:31:06 PM
Priceless!
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Ranger writes:
on November 24th, 2009 at 8:34:22 PM
And Dandy sustains a crushing blow (and by that I mean his Dad left his teeth in while doing so).
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Peter Parker writes:
on November 24th, 2009 at 8:36:03 PM
@ Dandythepussy:
"i FAKED liking it and got crazy pussy"
- You already where a crazy pussy. Faking it is just one of your newly learned female skills.
And you say you got laid after New Moon?
Sooo... the 45-year-old man ended up getting some action, uh? Atta girl!
Good for you both!
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minkowski writes:
on November 24th, 2009 at 8:54:54 PM
"And Dandy sustains a crushing blow (and by that I mean his Dad left his teeth in while doing so)."
That, or when dandylion felt his colon get punctured...
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Ranger writes:
on November 24th, 2009 at 9:04:26 PM
lol.
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jeffw1978 writes:
on November 24th, 2009 at 9:22:19 PM
Jesus dandy - when we talk about pussy we don't mean your cat, which I am sure you have tried to fuck at least once. And liking gay people makes you gay homo.
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Ranger writes:
on November 24th, 2009 at 9:33:21 PM
I don't know jeff... I'm straight and don't mind gays at all.
But dandy is one frustrated... something or other. The hetero's wouldn't mind him playing for the other team, yet I'm pretty sure the gay population doesn't need the headache either.
Paging Jerry Springer... Mr. Springer... pick-up!
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jeffw1978 writes:
on November 24th, 2009 at 9:38:55 PM
I don't mind gays, but I sure as fuck am not fond of them as dandythepussy puts it.
It needs therapy for sure!
JERRY! JERRY! JERRY!
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Ranger writes:
on November 24th, 2009 at 9:39:37 PM
Dr. Fill?
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jeffw1978 writes:
on November 24th, 2009 at 9:40:13 PM
"And you say you got laid after New Moon?
Sooo... the 45-year-old man ended up getting some action, uh? Atta girl!"
AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
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RoadDogXVIII writes:
on November 24th, 2009 at 9:44:01 PM
What a surprise.
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tomeenucknfutz writes:
on November 24th, 2009 at 9:46:23 PM
I bet she dug it!
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Ranger writes:
on November 24th, 2009 at 10:00:50 PM
That was my first thought.
Then she went home with this exotic experience in mind and made her Dad earn her allowance for a change.
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Ranger writes:
on November 24th, 2009 at 10:01:22 PM
And (of course) by 'her' I mean: dandy.
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Peter Parker writes:
on November 24th, 2009 at 10:04:38 PM
In a related story:
45-year-old Man Finds Out He Contracted AIDS In A Movie Theater
Shame on you, Dandy...
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Derp88 writes:
on November 24th, 2009 at 10:08:35 PM
That was Robert Patterson's dad who bit that biatch
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BigUnit writes:
on November 24th, 2009 at 10:15:26 PM
omfg that is sooo funny haha
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minkowski writes:
on November 24th, 2009 at 10:40:56 PM
Off-Topic (sort of)
You know what, I'm really fucking tired of seeing that faggot Robert Pattison on the cover of every magazine, and not because he's so damned popular either.
There's something about the way he looks, like he just sucked off his brother and he thinks doing so was clever.
And then they always have him in white face paint, so he looks like a cancer patient wearing a queer's street corner wig. Like he stole it off of Liberace's fucking corpse, wove in some pubic hair, and stradled it to his smirking, buttplug of a face.
I mean, fuck man, use him to scare people into using condoms. Plaster his face all over the pharmacies and the HIV clinics, with big bold letters saying "This is your face on AIDS".
He's what I can only guess happens when you don't practice safe sex with your sister's home-ec class partner, you know, the guy that likes to sew dresses and puts mascara on his pubic hair. Or in his case, Homo Ec.
It's like what you'd get if a flaming gay guy went trick or treating costumed up as a heterosexual. The gay would bleed right through.
And no, I'm neither gay nor do I hate them. I just don't ever want to be gay. Not even happy enough that someone would call me gay, using the other meaning. I like women. Most of them anyway, but only for sex. When they talk, I wish for death. Their's.
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The Skippy Spartan writes:
on November 24th, 2009 at 10:41:59 PM
You see kids, that creepy man is actually what a vampire is meant to look and act like....like a creep!
And they sure as hell DO NOT SPARKLE IN THE SUN!!
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Ranger writes:
on November 24th, 2009 at 10:42:43 PM
lol... feel better Mink?
I missed ya Bud!
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The Skippy Spartan writes:
on November 24th, 2009 at 10:43:47 PM
@Ranger
nice
@Mink
good to have back mate!
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vwkombi writes:
on November 24th, 2009 at 10:44:11 PM
One of her comments were "I would let that Edawrd bite me anytime". Maybe the old mans name was Edward and he misinterpreted because he didn't know the main character was named Edward because he wasn't paying attention because the movies shit.
Or perhaps i should welcome Twilight screenings as my brand new buffets!
@ Dandy
So who are you trying to impress? Clearly your taste in everything is terrible, nobody likes you and you have some sexuality issues you need to work out.
Plus it's so obvious that you bullshit ALOT because you are very unhappy in real life.
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minkowski writes:
on November 24th, 2009 at 10:47:49 PM
Yes, thanks for listening. Like Pattison converting his favorite manfriend into a queer, I just had to get that one out.
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minkowski writes:
on November 24th, 2009 at 10:49:11 PM
Thank you, good to be back. So let the good times come hard and fast, like Pattison at a bachelor party.
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goat1202 writes:
on November 24th, 2009 at 10:49:34 PM
dandythelion is just mad at the world cause he has 2 dads that pig roast him on a frequent basis, before and after his viewing of New Moon being one of them.
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Ranger writes:
on November 24th, 2009 at 11:03:57 PM
'pig roast him...' - LOL!
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Cd_Smith0 writes:
on November 24th, 2009 at 11:05:05 PM
I have to say I side with Mink and Ranger for a change.....Dandy is a douche
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minkowski writes:
on November 24th, 2009 at 11:07:38 PM
Could be made into a movie...The Vampire Bites Back.
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Ranger writes:
on November 24th, 2009 at 11:09:12 PM
Starring: Dandy-Douche and his Ass-Plowing Dad!
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minkowski writes:
on November 24th, 2009 at 11:15:10 PM
What's the difference between Dandy and a gay porno star?
The porno star gets paid.
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Peter Parker writes:
on November 24th, 2009 at 11:19:11 PM
Dandythepussy jokes?
Rolling up the sleeves, here we go:
- What does Dandy's dad say to Dandy going on vacation?
- Can I help you pack your shit?
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Ranger writes:
on November 24th, 2009 at 11:20:19 PM
dandy: Dad... did you pack the fudge?
Dad: What... you couldn't tell son?
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Peter Parker writes:
on November 24th, 2009 at 11:20:36 PM
- What's Dandy's most common pickup line in a gay bar?
- May I push your stool in?
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Ranger writes:
on November 24th, 2009 at 11:21:08 PM
What's the difference between having AIDS and knowing dandy?
At least with AIDS you die.
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Peter Parker writes:
on November 24th, 2009 at 11:21:44 PM
- How does Dandy know if he's at a gay picnic?
- The hotdogs taste like shit!
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Peter Parker writes:
on November 24th, 2009 at 11:22:29 PM
Four fags are sitting in a hot tub.
They notice some sperm rising to the surface.
Dandy says, "Ok, who farted?"
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Ranger writes:
on November 24th, 2009 at 11:22:48 PM
What's the difference between dandy and a bucket of shit?
Answer: the bucket.
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Peter Parker writes:
on November 24th, 2009 at 11:23:27 PM
- What's the difference between a refrigerator and Dandy?
- The fridge doesn't fart when you pull the meat out!
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Peter Parker writes:
on November 24th, 2009 at 11:24:51 PM
- What did one Dandy sperm say to the other?
- How are we ever gonna find an egg in all this shit?
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Ranger writes:
on November 24th, 2009 at 11:24:59 PM
dandy's dad told me this one...
What's the difference between dandy and a refrigerator?
Answer: a refrigerator doesn't fart when you pull your meat out.
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Peter Parker writes:
on November 24th, 2009 at 11:25:42 PM
- Why did Dandy get fired from the sperm bank?
- They caught him drinking on the job.
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Ranger writes:
on November 24th, 2009 at 11:26:17 PM
LOL... the fridge joke!
OK then...
Roses are red...
Violets are blue...
And dandy is a fucking cunt.
That's it.
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Peter Parker writes:
on November 24th, 2009 at 11:27:07 PM
Simple enough, straight to the point... Works!!
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Ranger writes:
on November 24th, 2009 at 11:27:10 PM
I wonder if dandy's parents ever had any kids.
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minkowski writes:
on November 24th, 2009 at 11:27:30 PM
"Four fags are sitting in a hot tub."
Sounds like Dandy's family reunion.
"Why was Dandy embarrassed when he was caught blowing the well-hung black delivery boy?
Because he was caught with a foot in his mouth. "
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Peter Parker writes:
on November 24th, 2009 at 11:28:06 PM
I wonder how long will these posts last this time...
I say two hours...
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Ranger writes:
on November 24th, 2009 at 11:30:22 PM
They'll be gone long before dandy gets his dick out of the family cat.
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minkowski writes:
on November 24th, 2009 at 11:32:46 PM
"I wonder if dandy's parents ever had any kids."
Yeah, someone else's.
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minkowski writes:
on November 24th, 2009 at 11:34:07 PM
"They'll be gone long before dandy gets his dick out of the family cat."
There's something illogical about that statement...dandy had pussy? Its like saying 2 + 2 = 5, when we all know it's 4, the length of dandy's vibrator.
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Ranger writes:
on November 24th, 2009 at 11:35:43 PM
ie: butt plug.
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Peter Parker writes:
on November 24th, 2009 at 11:43:27 PM
AKA: Fire Extinguisher.
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Peter Parker writes:
on November 24th, 2009 at 11:44:03 PM
Or, as dandythepussy calls it: Big Red.
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Cd_Smith0 writes:
on November 24th, 2009 at 11:47:29 PM
In basic terms for you to understand dandy...they hate you.
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Ranger writes:
on November 24th, 2009 at 11:48:54 PM
'Hate' is a powerful word.
I'm pretty sure I don't hate her (dandy). But I'd certainly take a crap on it.
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Peter Parker writes:
on November 24th, 2009 at 11:52:39 PM
I don't hate Dandy. I admire him. I mean, fighting AIDS like that must be hard...
A true inspirational story!
Plus, according to Dandy, he had sex with Kat Dennings!!!
Bwaahahahahahahahahahahahahahah!!
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minkowski writes:
on November 25th, 2009 at 12:06:00 AM
Hate? Nah. But imagine you're this burly masculine guy out on a African Safari. You've got your trusty elephant gun loaded and ready. Now, what do you see? A huge lumbering dumb elephant with a bright red target painted on it's broad side walks into view, right in front of you? Well, what do you do? You shoot the damned thing! Blam! But you don't hate the animal, not at all. Perhaps you have some pity for the poor creature, but how can you hate something so dumb and such a willing victim to a man's gun?
Same thing with dandy. In this case, though, the elephant is wearing a tutu, sporting a pink target, and has another elephants peanut-buttered trunk up its ass.
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Ranger writes:
on November 25th, 2009 at 12:34:56 AM
Why did dandy cross the road?
Answer: because Michael Jackson was in his ass, and dandy was in the chicken's ass... and the chicken just wanted to cross the road.
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Peter Parker writes:
on November 25th, 2009 at 1:02:58 AM
Dandy has a dick???!
Or was it the whole Dandy that was inside the chicken's ass?
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vwkombi writes:
on November 25th, 2009 at 1:08:06 AM
What's the difference between a microwave and Dandy?
A microwave doesn't brown meat.
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minkowski writes:
on November 25th, 2009 at 1:19:32 AM
"Dandy has a dick???!"
Sure he does. He has a bunch of them. Down at the YMCA.
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Ranger writes:
on November 25th, 2009 at 1:21:14 AM
I just took a shit.
And before I flushed, I said: 'That was a dandy!'
Now I know what they mean.
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triggax writes:
on November 25th, 2009 at 1:42:00 AM
This is what happens when you decide against WP for the most part now-a-days..
You miss the good stuff..
Go get fucked by a lightning rod you dirty dumb cunt douchethelion...
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Peter Parker writes:
on November 25th, 2009 at 1:43:04 AM
He's a sensation over at the Blue Oyster Bar.
They just love his ass there!
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realgirl76 writes:
on November 25th, 2009 at 1:51:49 AM
@Ranger,Mink,PeterParker
Those posts made my day!! Some funny shit, Like Dandy's breath smelling like Robert Pattinson's ass...
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Peter Parker writes:
on November 25th, 2009 at 1:52:51 AM
Hey, the comments made it past the 2 hour mark!
Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee...
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Peter Parker writes:
on November 25th, 2009 at 1:56:02 AM
@ realgirl76:
Much obliged, fair lady!
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minkowski writes:
on November 25th, 2009 at 2:04:52 AM
lol @ Ranger and Triggax.
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Ranger writes:
on November 25th, 2009 at 2:12:22 AM
thx. RG76 and Mink.
Trig - nice to see you Bro!
This has been fun.
Once a year we should all get together at dandy's trailer and kick the shit out of him.
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minkowski writes:
on November 25th, 2009 at 2:17:19 AM
"and kick the shit out of him."
Its either all gone, Ranger, or so far up its never coming out.
(Wow. Double pun on that last one. AND I'm rhyming. What a night.)
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Peter Parker writes:
on November 25th, 2009 at 2:18:35 AM
@ Ranger:
That'd be fun, but Dandy won't make it another year. The AIDS thing...
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Ranger writes:
on November 25th, 2009 at 2:27:12 AM
dandythelion - for a profile name... Jesus!
Why... was: 'ILickBalls!' already taken?
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Lordchristo writes:
on November 25th, 2009 at 3:01:05 AM
I hate getting off topic, but this is good stuff! Also, anyone who watches / reads anything Twilight related probably knows Dandy. Male Butt Sex is a serious problem.
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VN1X writes:
on November 25th, 2009 at 5:44:03 AM
Why is a 45-year-old man going to Twighlight?
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Derp88 writes:
on November 25th, 2009 at 5:50:34 AM
VN1X writes:
on November 25th, 2009 at 5:44:03 AM
Why is a 45-year-old man going to Twighlight?
I told you,its Robert Patterson's dad
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Eben1277 writes:
on November 25th, 2009 at 8:04:50 AM
I'm so psyched that got here before this shit got deleted today, I missed everything the other day, I felt left out. Of course I still feel left out because all the good jokes have been used up, and anything I add at this point would just seem like I was trying too hard. But at least I got to enjoy the verbal curb stomp.
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jeffw1978 writes:
on November 25th, 2009 at 9:14:27 AM
See this is what happens when you sleep, you miss all the gay dandy jokes.
I think they will be gone in about an hour after dandy sees them and cries to WP again
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NatG83 writes:
on November 25th, 2009 at 11:03:31 AM
This wasn't actually a 45 year old man, it was Lindsey Lohan.
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Ranger writes:
on November 25th, 2009 at 1:02:15 PM
And she ISN'T a 45 year-old man?!?!
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Ranger writes:
on November 25th, 2009 at 1:05:17 PM
I don't see a whole lot (anything) deleted. I think WP has been pretty generous, loosened the reins, and got a kick out of us taking that Negative Nancy of a member behind the wood shed for a mental adjustment.
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goat1202 writes:
on November 25th, 2009 at 1:48:35 PM
LOL, these posts are awesome, couldn't stop LOLing, seeing as how dandy has not replied he either A)has no balls and is scared or B)has already gone ahead and slit his wrists, leaving his 2 dads pigless for their daily roast!!
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thedudeman69 writes:
on November 25th, 2009 at 3:46:09 PM
I hope he didn't have teh swine flu
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Ranger writes:
on November 25th, 2009 at 4:04:38 PM
Yeah, I figure dandy has blood in his stool by now. Not from the whomping he's taken on here... but from the one his Dad gives him daily from behind!
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Peter Parker writes:
on November 25th, 2009 at 8:18:46 PM
The comments are still here!!
Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee...
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nope.com writes:
on November 25th, 2009 at 8:40:52 PM
http://www.tmz.com/2009/11/25/cops-bitten-twilight-fan-a-bloody-liar/
too bad the girl had to be a f*cking c*nt liar... all this talk for nothing
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Ranger writes:
on November 25th, 2009 at 9:05:56 PM
@nope - for nothing?!
I don't think so my friend. This thread was time well spent.
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Peter Parker writes:
on November 25th, 2009 at 9:08:41 PM
@ nope.com:
"telling cops the alleged culprit was simply kissing her on the neck at the time and she was a "willing participant."
- Which just further proves it was, in fact, Dandy in that theater.
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barley_cat writes:
on November 27th, 2009 at 8:43:33 AM
i hate going to the cinema and seeing old men there alone, it's freaky,... and they shift too much which is suspicious... Still if you were a pervert, what other film would you go to? Apart from maybe Disneys Up
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barley_cat writes:
on November 27th, 2009 at 1:10:35 PM
and lol at the fact that the only picture for this headline was one of patterson! haha
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Ranger writes:
on November 29th, 2009 at 5:55:59 AM
Well the picture of dandy getting ass-raped by his dads on allowance day was a bit too graphic (it showed naked ferrets as well... ewwwwww!).
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TheBlackCat writes:
on December 1st, 2009 at 10:27:38 AM
Just another attempt for attention and a reality show ...
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