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Eli Roth and Richard Kelly Almost Made a "Baywatch" Movie

Posted: August 23rd, 2009 by WorstPreviews.com Staff
Eli Roth and Richard Kelly Almost Made a "Baywatch" MovieSubmit Comment
Director Eli Roth (Hostel) spoke to LA Times about how he and "Donnie Darko" director Richard Kelly almost made a "Baywatch" movie.

"After 'Cabin Fever,' I had this meeting at CAA with my agents," Roth said. "They said, 'There's this project and this project, but what do you think about directing "Baywatch"?' And I was like, 'I want to do it! I'll cash in all my credibility!'"

He continued: "They said, 'There's no writer.' So I called up my friend Richard Kelly, the man who did a movie called 'Donnie Darko.' I was like, 'Rich, I have a great idea. It'll be ridiculous. We'll make it like a "Simpsons" episode, totally absurd.' And so we went and met with the producers who owned the rights. We said, 'You can say, "From the creators of 'Cabin Fever' and 'Donnie Darko' -- 'Baywatch 3-Double-D'!"'"

The project ended when Roth realized that the studio didn't like his approach. "We went on a bunch of pitch meetings and the next thing that happened was DreamWorks wanted it, but they wanted it to be an action movie. They wanted to hire their own writer and director. So all those jokes went out the window. Then I went off to direct 'Hostel.'"

Source: LA Times


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Displaying 27 comment(s) Profanity: Turn On
nope.com writes:
on August 23rd, 2009 at 7:29:28 PM

Bring the Hoff back and see where that gets you
nope.com writes:
on August 23rd, 2009 at 7:33:21 PM

Or Hoff as one of the paying customers in Hostel would have been a good cameo... with the victim in the chair being revealed as Yasmine Bleeth
acslaterson writes:
on August 23rd, 2009 at 7:37:21 PM

I think Roth should only be reffered to as "The Bear Jew" from now on. What one role could do for someone, haha. I hated that guy before this weekend!
dandythelion writes:
on August 23rd, 2009 at 7:56:23 PM

now that's something i'd pay to see.
c-prime writes:
on August 23rd, 2009 at 8:00:19 PM

"The project ended when Roth realized that the studio didn't like his approach."

Gee, what a shock. Sorry, Roth, but some people, myself included, take our scantily-clad, large-breasted, dripping-wet females very seriously.

"They wanted to hire their own writer and director. So all those jokes went out the window. Then I went off to direct 'Hostel."

It's a lose-lose situation. Regardless of the outcome, American audiences still end up suffering.


Ranger writes:
on August 23rd, 2009 at 8:20:40 PM

Re: Erika Eleniak...

Been there!

Tapped that!
BigUnit writes:
on August 23rd, 2009 at 8:40:53 PM

this may kind of be off topic but did any of you guys actually get the movie Donnie Darko?
SpookyCupcakes writes:
on August 23rd, 2009 at 8:46:06 PM

Phew, that was a movie I almost had to avoid.
DoucheNozzle writes:
on August 23rd, 2009 at 8:57:40 PM

Baywatch 3-Double-D would have been the greatest film of all time. Giant tits bursting forth from the screen then proceeding to f*ck the audience's eyeballs. Sheer movie magic. Thank God they waited to make it until now because, thanks to James Cameron's new 3-D camera, we can catch every moment of Hasselhoff's majestic pork-sword flopping up and down and slamming into his ripe and tender testicles in perfect clarity. The only drawback being the audience being blinded due to their corneas being smashed by the fury of the Hoff's floppy dong.
acslaterson writes:
on August 23rd, 2009 at 9:22:10 PM

@BigUnit, I saw it then went online to clarify what I had seen then rewatched it a couple days later. The only movie I have seen that I still don't know what the f*ck I saw was "Muholland Drive(spelling?)". That green bum gave me nightmares! Watts lesbianing it up was f*cking sweet though.
c-prime writes:
on August 23rd, 2009 at 9:25:50 PM

Good one, DoucheNozzle. God, I hope he waxes down there if it is in 3D. If I'm gonna get tea-bagged at the movies, I don't wanna get tickled in the face by his salt-smelling pubes.
Rich k writes:
on August 23rd, 2009 at 9:39:56 PM

Thank god they didnt.
DoucheNozzle writes:
on August 23rd, 2009 at 9:40:10 PM

Oh, the Hoff NEVER shaves off his holy pubes. If one curly hair is severed, his beefcake strength diminishes. Remember the last time he shaved, that's right, he made that hamburger video. We don't want to see our favorite sex stud that low again (or do we... Hehehehe...).
SpookyCupcakes writes:
on August 23rd, 2009 at 9:42:47 PM

"So all those jokes went out the window. Then I went off to direct 'Hostel.'"

Now I'm starting to think that a baywatch movie would've been a good idea...
DoucheNozzle writes:
on August 23rd, 2009 at 9:58:24 PM

Oh, the Hoff NEVER shaves off his holy pubes. If one curly hair is severed, his beefcake strength diminishes. Remember the last time he shaved, that's right, he made that hamburger video. We don't want to see our favorite sex stud that low again (or do we... Hehehehe...).
DoucheNozzle writes:
on August 23rd, 2009 at 9:59:42 PM

Double post... Damnit...
Ranger writes:
on August 23rd, 2009 at 10:12:46 PM

@Douche - and 3D tits.

Bugger... I was going to suggest that for the 3D thread with Scarlet Jo's rack instead of Cameron yapping on about it.

OK... off to the 3D Cameron thread anyway!
SpookyCupcakes writes:
on August 23rd, 2009 at 10:22:54 PM

I'm glad I could be in DN's hoff pube sandwich.
DoucheNozzle writes:
on August 23rd, 2009 at 10:48:46 PM

Hahahaha... Anytime, Spooky. But you've got to promise to me that you'll be gentle.
minkowski writes:
on August 24th, 2009 at 12:37:10 AM

I think Kelly and Roth were f*cking with the studios on this one. Either that, or they're both bigger whores than I thought.
Ranger writes:
on August 24th, 2009 at 12:58:56 AM

@Mink - re: Hollywood. Always bet on the bigger whores guess. It's better odds.
minkowski writes:
on August 24th, 2009 at 1:07:22 AM

lol. No kidding Ranger. Bastards.
Space_Ghost11 writes:
on August 24th, 2009 at 10:40:24 AM

I'd f*cking watch that just to see how ridiculous it would be, if anyone makes a Baywatch film they gotta bring back The Hoff for sure.
ACTIONFIGURE writes:
on August 24th, 2009 at 12:22:57 PM

Sadly, this would still be better that "southland tales"
timex89 writes:
on August 24th, 2009 at 12:50:08 PM

Sure, not the best stories, maybe, but I enjoyed the show when I was a kid. Too bad they don't air repeats here. Nicole Eggert, Kelly Packard and pre-cocaine Yasmine Bleeth were the best!
rob writes:
on August 24th, 2009 at 5:28:54 PM

How does Roth get work?
BurmaShave writes:
on August 25th, 2009 at 8:25:17 AM

Apparently they just offer the up and coming directors everything, with no regard for style. So strange.

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