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John Cleese Loses His Fortune to Ex-Wife

Posted: August 19th, 2009 by WorstPreviews.com Staff
John Cleese Loses His Fortune to Ex-WifeSubmit Comment
British comedian John Cleese has finalized the terms of his divorce from third wife Alyce Eichelberger, whom the 69-year-old married in 1992. The judge ruled that Eichelberger will receive assets worth $13 million and alimony of $1 million per year for the next seven years. That is over half of his estimated fortune.

Joking about the decision, Cleese said: "I got off lightly. Think what I'd have had to pay if she'd contributed anything!"

In the support of the actor, director/friend Michael Winner said: "The result is extraordinary. Alyce lived in a council flat when they met. As he put it, 'What I find so unfair is that if we both died today, her children would get much more than mine.'"

He continued: "There are no dependent children. If ever there was a case for prenuptial agreements, this is it."

In a previous statement, Cleese said of his divorce from Eichelberger: "It's going to be very, very expensive, but it will be worth every penny."

Source: Reuters


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Displaying 51 comment(s) Profanity: Turn On
masKritic writes:
on August 19th, 2009 at 5:29:35 AM

"Ouchtown, Population: You, bro" - Pepper Brooks
Eben1277 writes:
on August 19th, 2009 at 5:42:03 AM

At least he feels he's getting his moneys worth.
Trip Maverick writes:
on August 19th, 2009 at 6:46:09 AM

Damn 7 million cash over 7 years and 13 mill in assets, I wouldnt be surprised if thats most of his property. She must have had one wicked Lawyer.
Disintegration writes:
on August 19th, 2009 at 7:18:01 AM

lol I'm never gettingg married
minkowski writes:
on August 19th, 2009 at 7:45:26 AM

And women say they aren't whores. ha!

If you have money, men, NEVER get married. Hide your sh*t in a Swiss bank account. Convert it to gold and bury it in the backyard. Most women nowadays are like Peggy Bundy. They don't EARN it, but they'll be more than happy to take all or most of it. Which is VERY sad. Cleese earned his cash, and now some bitch is cleaning him oout.

And Alyce is a psychotherapist, so she's already very skilled at cheating people out of their money.
syrup writes:
on August 19th, 2009 at 8:05:38 AM

what a bitch, i can't stand that , i think cleese is great and its sad to see his hard earned money gone to some $$$hungry ex wife, sometimes the legal system is soo f*cked
shayhiri writes:
on August 19th, 2009 at 8:20:43 AM

He brought it on himself, didn't he? Most men will always be stupid.

Well, noones's taking MY money! :)
Hitodama writes:
on August 19th, 2009 at 8:23:48 AM

SHIZER!
SACdaddy writes:
on August 19th, 2009 at 8:34:20 AM

"I got off lightly. Think what I'd have had to pay if she'd contributed anything!"

Now thats some funny sh*t!
TH3D4RKKN1GH7 writes:
on August 19th, 2009 at 9:11:38 AM

I feel bad for these guys, him, Mel, Mike. Their women totaly rob them of what they've earned after so much hard work. This is probably the most severe though. I guess Cleese will be in quite a few more movies in the future.
eddie499 writes:
on August 19th, 2009 at 10:56:26 AM

Well, if we start seeing more of Johnny in the coming years, we'll know why. Perfect excuse to bring the Monty Python Guys back together.
Blank x2 writes:
on August 19th, 2009 at 11:15:47 AM

shayhiri, it's not nice to makes jokes about the opposite sex. Now go make me a sandwich.
Rarehunter writes:
on August 19th, 2009 at 12:00:24 PM

This happens all the time women sit at home you buy them sh*t and all the sudden she and you divorce papers and soon your lose money Damn bitch
Ranger writes:
on August 19th, 2009 at 1:03:17 PM

Remember in True Lies... when Tom Arnold tried cheering up Arnie, about wife # whatever? He came home one day and she emptied out the whole house... even took the ice cube trays? 'What kind of a sick Bitch takes the ice cube trays?!'

Exactly that happened to my brother. But when he got divorced he gave her half, and got her to agree on child support only (she was short-sighted that pig) - so when the kids hit 18... he's done with payments!

I dated a girl for 3 months. Proposed to me after 10 days (I didn't accept... clearly). Broke up with her in 90 days, and she tried suing me for $300K because her business (that her Daddy loaned her to set-up) was going bankrupt (as was she). Lol... needless to say that went nowhere.

Biaches.

PS: before some poor simpleton comes back with a 'interesting stories Ranger (meaning they're too stupid and lazy to read), but how does that apply to this tread?' -- if you have to ask... go study for your urine test.

John Cleese... the saddest thing about this happening to him is (that hasn't been commented on yet) is his age. He would probably like to have thought to slow things down in his life at 69, kick back a bit. Now his financial rug is pulled beneath him.

Hitmen are a LOT cheaper that half an estate and $1mil a year for 7 years folks. Even if he was foolish enough not to do a 'hit contract' beyond arms length, got caught and went to prison. Free food, no taxes, no EX-bitch, and he would be idolized in prison.

Think about it John.
Ranger writes:
on August 19th, 2009 at 1:03:40 PM

@Blank - LOL!
Toby writes:
on August 19th, 2009 at 1:06:26 PM

happens all the time...I was about to get married and the day before the wedding I said I'm not getting married....best thing I ever did
Ranger writes:
on August 19th, 2009 at 1:16:53 PM

Toby - you're my new Hero (seriously)!

Smartest move you ever made.
Toby writes:
on August 19th, 2009 at 1:21:32 PM

Ranger - Thanks
rocketman writes:
on August 19th, 2009 at 2:14:07 PM

You never hear about a guy taking half a womans fortune,sure it happens but whats the ratio?And this is equality?
Ranger writes:
on August 19th, 2009 at 2:17:37 PM

The vagina is a money pit. That's why you should f*ck 'em in the ass.
Ranger writes:
on August 19th, 2009 at 2:25:42 PM

Err... I mean.... make love in their bum.
masKritic writes:
on August 19th, 2009 at 3:03:03 PM

ha nice save, Ranger.
LincolnHawk writes:
on August 19th, 2009 at 3:04:25 PM

A man walks into his bedroom and sees his wife packing a suitcase. He says, "What are you doing?"
She answers, "I'm moving to Las Vegas. I heard ladies-of-the-night there get paid $400 for doing what I do for you for free."
Later that night on her way out the wife walks into the bedroom and sees her husband packing his suitcase.
When she asks him where he's going, he replies, "I'm going to Vegas, too. I want to see you live on $800 a year."
LincolnHawk writes:
on August 19th, 2009 at 3:06:57 PM

Money grabbing little bitch, way too much for 17 years of marriage! What does she need the money for? He should read the book 'A guide to a perfect marriage by OJ Simpson!'
Ranger writes:
on August 19th, 2009 at 3:07:18 PM

@Mas... lol, phew... thx!

@Lincoln... lol!
TeemSelami writes:
on August 19th, 2009 at 3:16:16 PM

he should have killed her. a defense attourney could have gotten him for 10 mill
Ranger writes:
on August 19th, 2009 at 3:32:44 PM

He wouldn't even need one. He'd be on the other side of the planet when it happened. And it would cost him a HELL OF A LOT LESS than this bullsh*t.
Dre-EL writes:
on August 19th, 2009 at 3:52:17 PM

Does anybody know who cheated on who or why they got divorced
Horsemoney5 writes:
on August 19th, 2009 at 3:58:06 PM

This is why you need a spouse that has a career, having a dependent spouse could most definitely end bad! If this was this guys third marriage he should of known better. Now he cant even feed his other kids.
acslaterson writes:
on August 19th, 2009 at 4:12:37 PM

If you are famous and you get married it isn't a hard thing to figure out, PRE NUP! How do these idiots keep getting duped? No amount of p*ssy is worth half your sh*t!
Ranger writes:
on August 19th, 2009 at 4:15:23 PM

@Dre - I doubt there was any cheating. She just put in her time and took an early retirement... from him.
SpookyCupcakes writes:
on August 19th, 2009 at 4:22:34 PM

That whore.
SpookyCupcakes writes:
on August 19th, 2009 at 4:23:55 PM

Oh yes and this is further proof that females are getting way too many more rights than males are.
Ranger writes:
on August 19th, 2009 at 4:38:31 PM

They can vote and drive now too! Bitches!
SpookyCupcakes writes:
on August 19th, 2009 at 5:45:45 PM

Selected Equality: A state where a race, gender or anything of the like demands to be equal in most areas, but either exempt or kept in higher regard in other areas of equality.

That's why, when you get a divorce, the Man usually has to pay child support to the fat c*ckgobbling ex wife of his. Also this is why many more women can get away with crimes, since jurors look kinder upon a female than a male.
SpookyCupcakes writes:
on August 19th, 2009 at 5:47:14 PM

Oh, AND not to mention the penalty is way more severe for a male if he hits a woman in self defense.
chiefone writes:
on August 19th, 2009 at 5:49:35 PM

Women are bitches, and some make a jus plain stupid.
There's a saying if you build it they will come. Well there's another saying. If you're dumb you'll be taken for every penny you've got.

A friend of mine has been moaning and bitching about how he hates his ex and how she stole his credit card to pay for her college tuition. Well this same friend of mine bumped into her a couple of weeks ago after they had been broken up for a couple years.

We usually meet up for lunch on weekdays. Well he just informed me that he'll be doing lunch with her this afternoon rather than meet up for our usual lunch

Need I say more
Ranger writes:
on August 19th, 2009 at 6:14:05 PM

@chief - sounds like your friend either likes the abuse, and/or has self-esteem, self-worth issues.

Go hit him repeatedly about the head with a baseball bat.
Ranger writes:
on August 19th, 2009 at 6:23:41 PM

@chief - seriously... at this point your friend is welcoming abuse like that into his life. He's a goner. Cut the line and cast again. lol.
acslaterson writes:
on August 19th, 2009 at 6:31:33 PM

Haha, I just remembered In Bruge, "A botle!" HAHAHA, f*cking Canadians!
lostwarrior writes:
on August 19th, 2009 at 6:45:54 PM

honestly its his fault, should of signed a prenup.. but oh well, the guy is wealther than most of us still. And it sounds like he was kinda expecting it. The lesson here is kids if your planning to get married have a prenup. I did, just in case. And if people say it takes the romance out of it. bullsh*t, its called living in reality, if she or he does mind signing it, them my friends u have something to worry about...
Derp88 writes:
on August 19th, 2009 at 7:41:31 PM

Hopefully she gets attacked by a bear
Derp88 writes:
on August 19th, 2009 at 7:46:26 PM

And the bear steals her money
Ari Gold writes:
on August 19th, 2009 at 8:03:55 PM

Guy Ritchie should of taken more of that tart Madonna!! When I heard Ritchie took some money, I heard bitches left and right moaning about it! Yet they rob men in just about every divorce on this planet!!

The best thing to do is to have a girlfriend who lives on her own, don't even let that bitch sleep over!!
Ari Gold writes:
on August 19th, 2009 at 8:04:23 PM

off*
bacci40 writes:
on August 20th, 2009 at 12:14:33 AM

she musta been a great lay
borat writes:
on August 20th, 2009 at 12:21:10 AM

raped!
Ranger writes:
on August 20th, 2009 at 1:30:23 AM

@Ari - lol.

'The best thing to do is to have a girlfriend who lives on her own, don't even let that bitch sleep over!!'

Word!
lost_addict writes:
on August 20th, 2009 at 12:39:44 PM

send that bitch to disrict 9 for prawn gangbang
Gunslinger writes:
on August 21st, 2009 at 12:26:37 AM

Touching, gentlemen, touching.
Ranger writes:
on August 21st, 2009 at 2:01:21 AM

I'd pipe bomb her snapper!

Or Cleese could use his star power... get her cast in Bay's new film with the hope that helicopter in it gives her the Vic Morrow treatment.

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